Thursday, February 16, 2006

Does someone have a Gawd complex?

Happy Thursday, chil’ren!

A bitch has been sitting here inhaling Smarties. Fantabulous! My ass expects to reach a sugar coma soon.

Let’s just jump right in, shall we?

A note about potty mouthism…
A certain Anonymous posted a rather odd comment declaring that a bitch is a Potty Mouth. Having not heard that phrase since grade school, a bitch had a good laugh. It always amazes me when folks take issue with swearing or cursing or cussing of whatever the fuck you call it. This bitch adores colorful language…and it is just that, language.

The history of naughty language is fantastical. Words come in and out of social acceptance as cultures change and evolve. My favorite former naughty word is knave. People used to get their ass kicked for calling someone a knave…you’ve gotta love that. Go ahead…say it.


Just rolls on out and slaps a motherfucker, doesn’t it?

Anyhoo, a bitch thanks Anonymous for pointing out the obvious and invites that knave to piss off!

Does someone have a Gawd complex…?
Yesterday’s news cycle was all about Dickie C.’s confessional non-confessional on FOX news. Our stoned faced Vice President took responsibility for shooting his hunting partner, but declared that he had no obligation to inform the American people about the circumstance of the shooting or the shooting itself in a timely manner.

A bitch still has questions regarding this incident. Dickie C. admission that he had a beer at lunch doesn’t exactly put to bed my notion that he was drunk off his ass and held the news of this shooting up until his blood alcohol level settled. If this was a personal trip with friends, then a bitch would like confirmation that my motherfucking tax dollars didn’t slide into the mix. Did Mr. Cheney pay for his Secret Service protection out of pocket? Did this bitch and my fellow Americans pay for his transportation to the ranch in Texas? In my mind, the Vice President is correct…if this was a private trip off the company dime the rules are different. But a bitch questions just how off the company dime this trip was. And a bitch also questions the notion that the President or the Vice President can ever truly be 'off the company dime' and unanswerable to the public…by whose will they hold office.

Having said that, a bitch thinks Dick Cheney may have a Gawd complex.

Since his boss, Scooter B., doesn’t have a strong understanding of his job description it’s not a huge leap to assume that Dickie C. is also confused. It dawned on me that the only time theses assholes here their job description as detailed in the United States Constitution is when they are officially accepting the job during the swearing in ceremony. And who’s going to start asking questions in front of the world? Can you imagine it?

“Umm, hold on a second. Did you say my job is the preserve and protect the Constitution of the United States of America? Oh! Glad you said something!”

Anyhoo, a bitch read this shit with some concern. It seems that our Vice President is thinking independently. More importantly, our Vice President is also acting independently. The news that the Vice President interprets his powers to be vast and without question shines a new light on some of his past behavior.

For example, those controversial closed door meetings with…well, a bitch isn’t sure who he met with since he refused to answer any questions other than to say that he met with energy ‘people’ to discuss the nation's energy policies. A bitch was concerned enough with the news that the Vice President, who has some serious ties to the energy industry, but that was before he clarified his ‘powers’ to be omnipotent. Now, a bitch wonders what major policy decisions Dickie C. made in that room. Mercy!

So, the Vice President can declassify national security information, make policy decisions behind closed doors then not issue any statement about what decisions were made and shoot people at will.

That doesn’t sound very American to me or Gawdlike to this bitch. Nope. Dickie C. must not have a Gawd complex.

This is more minionesque behavior.


Anonymous said...

A) The pictures you add to your posts are beyond hilarious.

B) I *love* your potty mouth. I copy and past sections of your posts and OF COURSE give a Bitch credit for her words, then send to a friend as particular expamples of brilliance and mastery of the English language.

C) Honestly, ole Dickie scares the shit out of me. And I felt that way before he started shooting people.


Anonymous said...

I sure miss the days when the role of the Veep was merely to ensure they'd left out enough dry food and water for him.

Omnipotent? Hell, most people pick the president and hope like hell it won't come down to the second string. Otherwise all I can say is it's a good thing that Dan Quayle did not discover the apparently unlimited powers of the office.

storm indigo said...

You are a very funny woman! Thank you. The longer these idiots are in office, the more they show of themselves. Honestly, I didn't think anyone could be worse than 'W', I was so very wrong.

Bitch, knave...I laughed until I cried. If I could fit a hat over these dreds I'd tip it...


Ancrene Wiseass said...

A bitch's deployment of colorful language is most excellent, and this commenter wishes to say how much she appreciates it. And also that the commenter who did not appreciate it is perfectly free to take his/her offended little peepers elsewhere on the Internets.

It is understandable that the offended commenter would be surprised to find "potty mouth" online, since the virtual world--like the real one--is chock-full of both cleanliness and Gawdliness. But a Wiseass suggests that the offended commenter use his/her browser's parental filters to avoid the very small percentage of sites like this one, where hedonistic people gather to flout the conventions of decency.

(Okay, so sometimes a Wiseass is a sarcastic bitch.)

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