Thursday, January 30, 2014

RIP Betsey the Sorta-Beagle...

It is my sad duty to report that Betsey the sorta-beagle, my beloved pet-companion for over a decade, passed away yesterday morning.

She was 15 years old.

Longtime readers will remember Betsey as a badass bundle of joy who often kept me centered when all things were anything but balanced.

Our house is a little too quite without the click of her nails on the floor, the strangely soothing rhythm of her loud as hell snoring while napping, or the sharp clap of her outraged bark when the mail comes through the slot.

She will be dearly missed.

If you are so inclined, please donate to Stray Rescue of St.Louis in her honor.

Adopting a rescue dawg was one of the best decisions I ever made in life...and I encourage anyone who is considering adding a pet to your family to do the same.  Betsey was two years old when she joined our family and, since she was far from perfect, she fit right in!

Many thanks to the wonderful staff at Hillside Animal Hospital for their loving care and support over the years and during Betsey's final moments.

And special thanks to my sister C-Money for everything.

Rest in peace, happiness, and endless joy, Betsey the sorta-beagle!

Forever in my heart...always.

Friday, January 03, 2014

On calling out the shit in the middle of the room…

Happy 2014, y’all!

I’ve been absent from the internets for a long spell. Between a starting a new job (yay!), dealing with some personal drama (not so yay, but getting better), and news that Betsey the sorta-beagle is in the process of dying from cancer (sob)…well, there’s been a lot of offline distractitude in my world.


But I’m back, so…

…shall we?

***pause…sip coffee and snuggle Betsey the sorta-beagle…continue***

I’ve observed several recent Twitter-based corrections within the feminist world and I’ve noticed a pattern. 

More accurately, I’ve noticed a continuation of an offline pattern take place online.

Someone within the movement indulges in a public display of privilege/bigotry, people point it out and express their outrage/shock/pain/disappointment, and then other folk start talking about tolerance and how we shouldn’t eat our own.

Cue chaos…more outrage/shock/pain/disappointment…and folk fretting about how all of this is bad for feminism because the world is watching.

I’ve been blogging for some eight years (gasp) and this ain’t new. Longtime readers know that I’m not a fan of the school of tolerance. One tolerates a stench and hopes it goes away. I don’t know many folk who want to be the stench of feminism.   

When a person takes a shit in the middle of the room tis important to everyone within that room that 1) that shit gets cleaned up, 2) the source of the shit understands that shitting in the middle of the room isn’t acceptable or productive and is the very definition of insulting and disturbing, and 3) that folk appreciate that the room shitter, through the act of shitting in the middle of the room, has reset reality and will have to prove over time that they understand that and aren’t going to gleefully take a public crap again.

We all get this. 

It isn’t confusing. 

We’ve all watched some amazing Twitter-based and/or online actions calling out room shitters.

Nope, this isn’t confusing…until we encounter a situation where the shit in the middle of the room originated from someone on the left.

Did I mention that this ain’t new?

This fumble over how to address wrongness from within keeps flaring up…and tis why I’m committed to making 2014 a year of realness.

Y’all, it is beyond important that we encourage and respect authentic responses to public displays of bigotry and privilege. 

If women of color had a dollar for every time we’ve been told to give someone a break after they just took us out at the knees, we might be able to fund an international multi-media campaign to educate the masses on why we ain’t trying to hear that shit.

And it is critical that we cease tolerating and explaining away displays of bigotry and/or privilege from within.

The whole world is indeed watching and nothing damages a movement like hypocrisy. That’s why we are quick to gleefully point that mess out when conservatives do it!

Lawd knows I’m a better activist for having been told about myself along the way…for being forced to look at my shit in the middle of the room and clean it the hell up…and for being given the gift of an opportunity to learn and grow.


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