Wednesday, February 15, 2006
By request…Behold, Rufus!
For C-Money with love.
With the frenzy and confusion about who fucked up Katrina relief, who shot who where and why, and all things war related it’s easy to overlook the crowning of a champion.
Rufus, a bitch is impressed!
Way to go, you dawg-like thing!
Now, a bitch has some issues with pure bred dawgs. This bitch lives in a state famous for puppy mills and meth, so an industry that promotes the pure over a good old fashioned mutt rubs me wrong.
But a bitch adores all things canine and couldn’t help but watch the Westminster Dawg Show last night.
ABB’s Completely Made up Shit about That Dawg Show…
C-Money nursed a beer in agitated frustration as her favorite, a fancy assed Rottweiler named Shaka Zulu, started out strong then seemed to get flustered when it came time for Best in Show. Our living area seemed to pulse with the tension as Shaka squared off with that sassy Golden Retriever and a certain Bull Terrier named Rufus.
C-Money’s scowl grew as the crowd loudly proclaimed their adoration for the Golden Retriever.
“What the fuck? Hello!?! The Rott, motherfuckers! The Rott!” she muttered angrily.
“But that Golden retriever is so cute, Money! Look…see that smile?” a bitch replied.
“Shit, anyone with an ounce of sense can see that Shaka is the shit.” C-Money replied.
A bitch, always one to cave to any indictment of my senseliness (wink), quickly switched allegiance to Shaka.
Go forth and win one for all the Rotts of the world who endure fear and misunderstanding!
No! No!! Bad dawg.
He became distracted and confused during Best in Show. And that fucking Golden Retriever seemed to prance with renewed enthusiasm. What an asshole! Cocky little motherfucker.
The tension grew. The judge reviewed and then noted his decisions.
C-Money leaned forward.
A bitch took a long sip of vodka followed by cran.
The Bull Terrier?
You’ve gotta be shitting me!
Pause. Sip more vodka cran and watch as steam rises off of C-Money.
Fuck it. That dawg is cute as a motherfucker.
“C-Money?” a bitch asked quietly.
“You can’t be mad! Everyone loves a terrier!” this bitch replied with fiendish joy.
“Fuck you, Shark-fu. Fuck you and your terrier loving ass.” C-Money shot back with a twinkle in her eye.
Who needs the Olympics, chil'ren?
This day belongs to the dawgs...