Tuesday, April 12, 2005

Breaking News - West Virginia Votes to Make English the Official State Language

The Official Language of the State of West Virginia is now English.

From the ABB International Post
Desperate West Virginians are jamming the Hooked on Phonics web-site and 1 (800) number as the realization that few West Virginians actually speak English sinks in. Fear and panic has swept the state and crisis hotlines are stretched beyond capacity as thousands take to the hills for fear of a "proper" speaking mandate. Sadly, a certain segment is totally unaware of the change because they simply didn't understand the announcement.

Next time a state gets uppity with language, please let it be one who's local linguistic liberties don't already qualify as a second language. Jesus!

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