I’m going to observe rather than participating in the September 11 remembrances today...and keep my thoughts and memories to myself. There have been some amazing posts today, though...some very powerful stuff.
However, a bitch still plans to tune in and watch Scooter B’s address to the nation tonight.
Thus, a plan-like thing is required.
ABB’s list of needed things…
Cran…actually, grape cran is the cran of the moment
Ice in cube form…ummm, for the drinks
A shot glass…ummm, for the shots
Lots of water…because this bitch has to go to work tomorrow
Multitudes of Excedrin…because this speech is guaranteed to give me a headache, whether my ass has been drinking or not.
A legal pad…to jot down all manner of shit.
A sorta-beagle…to snore loudly beside a bitch and remind me that all is not rancid in the world.
TiVo…because it is worthy of adoration and absolutely required for specificity and accurate bitchitude!
ABB’s scorecard/guide for consumption…
Note – due to the anticipation of numerous September 11 references, the 1 shot per reference rule has been suspended.
Oh, and don’t drink and drive either…for the love of all that is lovable.
Exception to the note…the 1 shot per September 11 reference as justification for expanding Presidential powers on a scale that would have made Nixon orgasm for a solid non-stop hour (sorry about that visual, chil'ren) rule still applies.
Sweaty upper lip – 3 sips of vodka cran
Fidgety behavior due to odd sensation of wearing “grown people clothing” and/or gas – 1 sip of vodka cran
Cocking of the presidential noggin to the side and/or snortage through one nostril to…ummm, clear the pipes of The Decider and Chief – 2 sips of vodka cran
And this bitch plans to consume a pre-speech meal or things could get a wee bit crazy up in my living area tonight…
Toodles for now.