Happy Day After Halloween, y’all!
As usual, the House of Bitchitude prepared for Halloween by prepping several large bowls of candy and toys/games for wee ones with allergies and such. A rather witchy C-Money decorated our porch and displayed a seriously creepy plastic skeleton on the lawn.
Knowing us, these items will remain up through December.
After double checking our treat distribution strategy, searching in vain for the scary noise maker, and getting our outdoor house light (inside joke for Ellen, Alex, and Tim Jr. - some people call it a sconce!), we sat down and waiting for crowds of children to knock on our door.
And waited some more.
Finally, the first wee ones … as usual, the toddler crews came out first … gave us a knock.
Adorable and super polite young humans escorted by excited parents taking pictures!
Following the early trick or treaters, turnout was low but those who made the effort were super excited by the temporary tattoos, coloring book packet, and creepy finger toys C-Money insisted were a necessary addition to our Halloween offerings.
Best dawg costume goes to my neighbor’s badass Corgi who showed up in a snazzy lobster outfit. She got a scritch … okay, she got several and then was off to make friends elsewhere.
The Most Amusing Parent Escort award goes to the man who was either tipsy, exhausted, or both … lumbering behind his crew of two and sporting a long coat, holding a large coffee mug, while half-heartedly admonishing his kids for negotiating hard over which comic book packet they wanted.
Me, after praising their cute-as-hell costumes: “Would you like a coloring book and candy or some creepy scary fingers and candy?”
Tick or Treater #: “Wow! Um, I’d like a coloring book and candy!”
As I hand over the loot, Trick or Treater #2 tosses out: “Wait! You don’t even like Pikachu! Give me…”
Father, gesturing casually with mug while standing on the sidewalk: “Oh, no … here we go again. C’mon ***mumbles child’s name***, let’s not…”
ToT#1: “But …”
Me, visibly confused: “Well, you can have a … what was that, again ... you can have a Pico de Choo Whatnot … which one is it?”
ToT#1 and ToT#2 fix shocked eyes on me and gasp in shock.
ToT#1, speaking softly and slowly as if she’s realized that she is now standing in front of some sort of alien: “Picachu is THAT one.”
I hand it over.
She takes is without taking her eyes off me.
Father: “Alright. Okay. Now say thank you and let’s keep this moving.”
ToT#1 and ToT#2, back up slowly, mumble their thanks and then turn and run to the next house with their parent strolling along after them and shouting behavior expectations.
I closed the door and shared the story with C-Money who explained that Pikachu is a very popular Pokémon.
I learn something new every day, y’all.
Every damn day.