Happy Day After Halloween, y’all!
As usual, the House of Bitchitude prepared for Halloween by
prepping several large bowls of candy and toys/games for wee ones with
allergies and such. A rather witchy C-Money decorated our porch and displayed a
seriously creepy plastic skeleton on the lawn.
Knowing us, these items will remain up through December.
After double checking our treat distribution strategy,
searching in vain for the scary noise maker, and getting our outdoor house
light (inside joke for Ellen, Alex, and Tim Jr. - some people call it a sconce!),
we sat down and waiting for crowds of children to knock on our door.
And waited.
And waited some more.
Finally, the first wee ones … as usual, the toddler crews
came out first … gave us a knock.
Adorable and super polite young humans escorted by excited
parents taking pictures!
Yay!
Following the early trick or treaters, turnout was low but
those who made the effort were super excited by the temporary tattoos, coloring
book packet, and creepy finger toys C-Money insisted were a necessary addition
to our Halloween offerings.
Best dawg costume goes to my neighbor’s badass Corgi who
showed up in a snazzy lobster outfit. She got a scritch … okay, she got several
and then was off to make friends elsewhere.
The Most Amusing Parent Escort award goes to the man who was
either tipsy, exhausted, or both … lumbering behind his crew of two and sporting
a long coat, holding a large coffee mug, while half-heartedly admonishing his
kids for negotiating hard over which comic book packet they wanted.
Me, after praising their cute-as-hell costumes: “Would you
like a coloring book and candy or some creepy scary fingers and candy?”
Tick or Treater #: “Wow! Um, I’d like a coloring book and
candy!”
As I hand over the loot, Trick or Treater #2 tosses out: “Wait!
You don’t even like Pikachu! Give me…”
Father, gesturing casually with mug while standing on the
sidewalk: “Oh, no … here we go again. C’mon ***mumbles child’s name***, let’s not…”
ToT#1: “But …”
Me, visibly
confused: “Well, you can have a … what was that, again ... you can have a Pico
de Choo Whatnot … which one is it?”
ToT#1 and ToT#2 fix
shocked eyes on me and gasp in shock.
ToT#1, speaking
softly and slowly as if she’s realized that she is now standing in front of
some sort of alien: “Picachu is THAT one.”
I hand it over.
She takes is without
taking her eyes off me.
Father: “Alright.
Okay. Now say thank you and let’s keep this moving.”
ToT#1 and ToT#2,
back up slowly, mumble their thanks and then turn and run to the next house
with their parent strolling along after them and shouting behavior expectations.
I closed the door
and shared the story with C-Money who explained that Pikachu is a very popular Pokémon.
Blink.
I learn something
new every day, y’all.
Every damn day.
3 comments:
Awwwwwwwwwww
We didn't get any trick-or-treaters, which is a damn shame, as our black cat visitor was curled up on a pillow next to the pumpkin on our porch, and looked Halloween-y as all get out.
-Doug in Oakland
Seconding the awwww! We had a grand total of five trick-or-treaters last night (Oakland), and one of them was in fact dressed up as Pikachu.
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