Sunday, June 05, 2011

I forgot to put my car in PARK last Monday…

Take a deep breath.

And begin.

Over Memorial Day weekend I crashed…literally and figuratively.

I was getting sick and was already tired, so I took to my bed to try and head illness off at the pass.

It didn’t work.

By Monday my head cold was kicking in…but I hadn’t done all the shit that I needed to do, so I rallied my exhausted almost sick ass to go out and run errands.

My last stop was the grocery store.

I turned into the parking lot…head pounding and mind racing with all the shit I’d need to try to do once I finished shopping and got home.

Slide into parking space.
Check wallet for funds, cell phone and shopping list.
Get out and lock door.

I walked quickly into the market, got a basket and started shopping.

I was more than half way through my list when an announcement came over the store channel… “Will the owner of a blue Volkswagen Cabrio please come to the customer service desk?!”

“Shit,” I thought…or maybe even said… “That’s my car!”

I left the basket…befuddled and concerned…and made my way to the customer service desk.

“Your car hit another car in the parking lot.”


That didn’t make sense.

The machines hadn’t become self-aware…had they?

Ms. Sistah Girl Cabrio couldn’t just take it upon herself to go for a drive and hit something…could she?

Hit something…hit some thing…oh, Gawd…what if my car hit some…one?

Bolt out of the store.
Across the parking lot, like a blur.
Ears ringing.
Heart racing.

There was my car…kissing the ass of a cherry red Chrysler.

There were a couple of other shoppers…their faces full of shock as if they’d just leapt out of the way of a runaway Volkswagen Cabrio.

And there was the owner of the Chrysler…an older black woman who was equal parts disturbed and confused.

“Is everyone okay?”
“Was anyone hurt?”

Everyone was okay.

No one was hurt.

I took a deep breath, clenched my hands into fists, and gazed under my car.

No crushed limbs…no mangled bodies.

Everyone's okay!
No one's hurt!

Insurance information was exchanged….I moved my car to a different spot...Chrysler lady and I parted ways rather quickly.

I had neglected to put my car in park.

So busy…always rushing…not feeling well and so many errands to finish.

When I had parked my car earlier there had been a car in the spot opposite to mine…when that customer left, my car was no longer restricted…still in drive, it went ahead and drove….

Across the parking lot…only a few feet…past at least one woman who barely missed getting hit…and into the ass of a cherry red Chrysler.

Back into the store….finish shopping and check out…return to car.
Hands shaking.
Key in ignition.
No one…hurt.
From PARK to DRIVE and then REVERSE.
Oh my Gawd, oh my Gawd, oh my Gawd.
REVERSE to DRIVE and then go.

I drove home and parked (brake up, this time).

I took the groceries out and into the house.

Fed the dawgs.

Put the groceries away.

Sank to my knees...

heart racing…hands shaking…

…my hands with palms down on the cool wood of the floor

…and cried.

Because everyone was okay and no one was hurt when I forgot to put my car in PARK last Monday.



'Drea said...

What you said: everyone was physically okay and that's what counts.

Hope that you've recuperated in other ways...

Christian said...

Holy crap. I am glad you're okay. I am glad everyone else is okay. Yikes.

LisaMJ said...

Glad you and everyone are ok and Sister Cabrio didn't do too much damage to the other car (and your insurance didnt' go up too much). Don't feel too bad it was an accident. Sometimes, when you are sick it doesn't pay to drive. My Mom who had been driving for about 30 years at the time and had never had an accident once hit someone's car in a parking lot when she was sick and HAD to run an errand (after driving from DC to NJ). It happens.

Hugs across the miles (you poor thing, you keep getting the plaugue).

Vesuvian Woman said...

Almost want to say that you are doing too much, but you know as well as I do: It's never going to seem like you're doing enough. So many what-ifs... God has your back and we only pay attention to His quiet whispers when He throws a monkey-wrench into an otherwise ordinary day. Bless you and rest up, you have to get back to saving the world ; )

Anonymous said...

You have a big-ol' hug from Michigan headed your way, I'm glad no one was hurt and damage was minimal. All will work itself right, have no fear.


dante. said...

in a perverse sort of way, I couldn't help but enjoy the way in which you told this story. If you've never considered writing short stories, you most definitely should.

However, realistically and humanely speaking, I can't express how glad I am that you or no one else was hurt. I am sorry to hear that you have not been feeling well.

Sending positive energy your way,


honeybfly said...

It's all good. Hug the dawgs, cut yourself some slack and feel better.

Mark said...

I am gonna step into the shoes of your hypothetical Concerned Relatives and cuss you out. THIS incident, my dearest darling Shark Fu, was a hint from the Universe for you to SLOW. THE. FUCK. DOWN!! GIRL. What were you THINKING? What the fuck were you even DOING getting into your car when you knew you were in that bad of a condition? If'n you don't rest up, recuperate, and heal yourself, you will just get sicker, sleepier, and unleash a whole lot more whoop-ass than a little sliding car nonsense.

Now GO REST. That's an order, miss.
Hugs from a long time fan in Madison, WI
Mark L.

Shark-Fu said...

Message received and thank you. Resting & taking meds. Sigh.

pat said...

Jeez, I'm sorry you're poorly and that you had this scare. These things happen. I send you best wishes and sweet dreams from Vienna.

Scott said...

The main thing is nobody was hurt. Look at it this way, you didn't try to convince your audience that you didn't do it. You didn't say “I can't say with certitude.” like Anthony Weiner did. You owned up to the fact that you simply forgot to put your vehicle in park. Not only that, but you had the unfortunocity of an "almost sick ass" that you had to drag out of bed in order to complete the tasks of the day.

I consider you a brave, selfless and above all, HONEST person. I certainly hope you are now feeling tip top again.

Anonymous said...

This happened to me 3 days ago....glad I'm not the only idiot on earth

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