Thursday, September 27, 2007

An Outbreak of Consequensus Avoidus Robustus...

A bitch is breaking into your regularly scheduled bitchitude to announce that there has been another outbreak of Consequnesus Avoidus Robustus in the nation’s capitol.

Blink.

Mmmhmmm, my ass finally figured it out when I read this shit about how Senator Larry Craig is postponing his resignation.

I know…a bitch should have waited to have my findings vetted in peer review, but this is a matter of great importance!

Here’s what I’ve got.

For years political observers have noted the gridlock and general slow pace of Washington D.C. political bitness, which they always called “politics as usual”.

But what I’m seeing isn’t mere political ineptitude…it’s some sort of dangerous disease.

Observe.

Scooter B. refuses to be held accountable for anything at any time ever…particularly regarding the war. I mean, the man went out and told everyone that September 2007 would tell the tale then held a press conference and told us to fuck off on national television.

We’re neck deep in a war without an exit plan or a defined measurable political objective...Social Security doesn’t have enough money to meet it’s obligations…immigration reform died…overt racism is coming out of the closet…chil’ren have been left behind…health care sucks, our energy infrastructure is vulnerable to attack, our roads and bridges have gone to shit…oh, and the dollar isn’t worth shit anymore.

But what’s been occupying the time of Congress?

A newspaper advertisment…

Lawd, a bitch would scream Move On, damn you…but that’s just too weird, isn't it?

Anyhoo, that brings me to the final symptom…Senator Craig, announced that he is going to delay his withdrawal…umm, err resignation from the Senate. This is the same resignation with date certain that he announced after initially trying to downplay his arrest and guilty plea for soliciting some action in a Minneapolis airport bathroom.

Craig is a textbook case of Consequnesus Avoidus Robustus. He denied the charges then pled guilty…then tried to make it all go away only to come out swinging when it didn’t…which he followed up by proclaiming his ungayness then announcing his resignation to fight the good fight…only to then take all that back, but still try to get his conviction tossed because he wants to keep his job.

These people are ill, chil’ren!

And this strain of Consequnesus Avoidus Robustus has proven resistant to the antibiotics Media Feeding Frenzy and The Disgust of the Masses.

Some of you will say that this outbreak doesn’t matter.

But a bitch believes that actions without immediate consequences have out of this world consequences waiting down the road.

Sigh.

Alert - Consequnesus Avoidus Robustus creates the bi-product of abundant bullshit. The masses should wear Wellies and face masks until my vaccine, tentatively named Power to the People Fist Held High Militancy Part II, is ready for release…

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

I've had waders and gas masks in my basement for a long time . . .