Wednesday, November 01, 2006

For the love of all that is holy!

A bitch woke up unable to completely remember my dream from last night.

It’s rather foggish, but a bitch recalls the fierce dream-based correction of a certain Senator Kerry…which involved, among other things, him writing I Will Not Talk Crazy on an enormous chalkboard non-stop for the next …what is it, 6 days?

Lawd, have mercy!

It doesn’t matter what he meant to say…since we are now shoveling out from what he did say…and this bitch thought what he did say was rather insulting my own self.

A bitch thinks he should be taken away…far away…waaaaaay far away...PLEASE...since he still has some inner work to do when it comes to accepting the reality that 2008 is not gonna be his year.

Mercy.

I’m surviving this unfortunate media moment with the following mental picture…

Senator Kerry, bedecked in boxing gear with a microphone swinging above him whilst he shadow boxes…ummm...well, the shadowfied demons of previous election verbal fumbletastic event-like happenings.

Ahem.

Kerry grabs the microphone and attempts to channel LL Cool J…

Dont call it a comeback
I been here for years
Annoying my peers and puttin undecides in fear

Sighing hard...

18 comments:

AOB said...

...writing 'I will not talk crazy'...OMG I have not laughed this hard in ages.....

GayProf said...

It wasn't really clear to me why Kerry still has a platform to speak. Shouldn't we be looking at some "new" Dems?

Regina said...

The idea of Kerry channeling LL Cool J has me in stitches. So apropos.

leomange said...

well said, abb. it's obvious what he meant to say, it's obvious what he said, it's obvious it was a gaff, and it's obvious scooter b will use it to his advantage if possible. kerry-isms will never top bush-isms for shear hilarity and... well, that's just it--kerry shouldn't try to be funny (especially a week before the midterms).

the way he bungled the joke is similar to how he bungled the election: over-explaining the wrong shit, while glossing over the goods.

and that's similar to how i'm bungling this comment...

i mean, uh, "right on"!

DemDems said...

IMO Kerry has become something of a liability to the Democrats. He needs to get some sort of platform other than 'Bush Bashing' which granted -- is a pretty big platform, but even that gets old after a while. Did they not learn anything in 04? Retire the Kerry and bring in someone with a real platform up to the plate. Please.

B. Kitty said...

Today is Dia de los Muertos.

Celebrate!

Its a day to celebrate the dead...

For most of us Hispanics...this means dead loved ones.

For Senator Kerry...this means his career.

If he costs us another election...ugh.

~Macarena~ said...

I didn't think it was a joke, and that dismissing it as such was his first mistake. Mostly, I resent the culture of false apology.

Nancy in NYC said...

Whoever's in charge of keeping John Kerry from talking crazy shit has been sleeping on the job.

Anonymous said...

I smile every time I see the "chastisement" icon - fine bitching ahead! Really - why can't Kerry just go off and head a charity, or be a professor, or something...

NancyP

Nancy in NYC said...

Whoever's in charge of keeping Kerry from saying dumbass things is defintely not earning her paycheck this week.

KingHorse said...

An east coast bitch is grateful to a midwestern bitch for keeping us focussed on the obvious -- that Kerry is an idiotic, self-absorbed liability -- because an east coast bitch is ripping her own head off in frustration over the Paris-Hilton-popular boy bloggers' rush to defend him.

With due respect to leomange, it wasn't at all obvious what Kerry meant to say. It was a novice error that's not only inexcusable in a politician of his seniority but also made the Democrats look terrible in front of millions of confused voters...ONE WEEK before MIDTERM ELECTION.

KingHorse said...

An east coast bitch is grateful to a midwest bitch for keeping us focussed on the point -- which is that Kerry is an idiotic, self-absorbed liability -- especially since EC bitch is ripping her own head off in frustration over the Paris-Hilton-popular boy bloggers' rush to defend him.

With all due respect to leomange, it wasn't at all obvious what Kerry meant to say. It was a novice error not only inexcusable by someone of his seniority, but one that makes Democrats look terrible ONE WEEK before a MIDTERM ELECTION.

Lawd, show no mercy.

DP said...

Talk about snatching defeat from the jaws of victory.


No matter what happens, if The Dems dont pull out at least the House, they are goingto lay this right at the Feet of Mr. Kerry-Heinz

Jeff said...

John who? ::giggle::

On the subject of your correction-based dreams, I had a nightmare last night (nightmare, I tell you!) in which Condoleeza Rice was playing an Army general in a movie. Even if she did look good in fatigues with the arms rolled up to look all tough, I did not find her performance convincing.

Clearly, whoever's programming my dreams is in need of some correction....

EB said...

At this point, I think he'd do us all a favor by pulling a Jim Jeffords. That way, the Republicans can worry about cleaning up his messes from now on... I don't see where he's benefited the Democrats much at all latel--er, ever...

Anonymous said...

Ms. ABB, Love your blog and usually agree with you on most topics but I have to disagree with your assessment on Kerry's statement. Check out the Keith Olbermann's blunt and straightforward clip at http://towleroad.typepad.com. to quote you "that is what this bitch calls a correction!" Forget about the Missouri Baptist Convention deciding to Wal-Mart, Olbermann's preached my kind of religion.

Jeff said...

Still, I do like what Ken Olbermann had to say about it all:

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/15519404/from/ET/

Shark-fu said...

A certain Olbremann is making friends left and right (wink)!

A bitch agrees that there are apologies owed all over the place, but I also hold Mr. Jerry to a higher standard.

As a veteran of a war that exposed some of this nation's bitter class divisions, he should have clarified his fuck up from a place of understanding rather than defiance.

Scooter B., on the other hand, was the beneficiary of those class divisions during Nam so...well, it just makes handing him the flag of troop support all the more fucked up in my eyes.

Sigh.

A bitch just hopes the storm has passed....