Thursday, June 09, 2005

You deserve a break today....

McDonald’s is launching a new advertising campaign aimed at America’s kids. Ronald McDonald’s head is placed on a detached super fit cutout of himself. He’s featured playing soccer and eating fruit salads. Why? Because burgers and fries are sometimes foods!

A bitch fucking loves this shit!

The P.R. hack that was interviewed on the Today Show this morning was beyond amusing. She said something like “Ronald has an opportunity to be a positive force for good!” How many hours and how much dedication goes in to crafting a phrase of complete simplistic bullshit like that? We are talking talent, people! Talent!

Anyhoo, a bitch was thinking that the digitally re-mastered Ronald is probably a good idea. American kids are dealing with serious weight issues and Type 2 diabetes is getting out of control. It can’t hurt, but is McDonald’s really to blame? Should Ronald have to carry the weight (pun intended) of America’s obesity problem on his shoulders?

ABB’s Ponderings on Food

Fast Food
A bitch is confused by the argument that fast food is responsible for America’s weight problems. It sounds too much like the arguments surrounding the war of drugs. Basically, we are blaming the suppliers again.

Fast food isn’t free and consumption of it isn’t required by law. No one is going to be dragged into court for not meeting his or her French fry quota this year. Yet, we are asking an industry to remove items from their menus that are actually selling. People need to step back and grab hold of reality. You eat it by choice. This bitch takes total responsibility for consuming vast portions of fried chicken, which resulted in weight gain. A bitch never assumed that fried chicken wouldn’t end up on her ass! I ate it because it was a comfort, but I never convinced myself that there wasn’t a cost associated with that comfort. Add to this the fact that there was a real monetary cost as well. This bitch has shelled out hundreds of dollars over the years to get my fix. I’m actually saving money by doing Weight Watchers. Fuck.

At any rate, I understand that marketing plays a part. When a bitch is feeling down and a commercial for Popeye’s comes on I want it. I want that two piece with a biscuit and a pepper! But the marketing doesn’t work if I’m not hungry and in need of comfort. Take a bitch’s soul out of the dumpster and that commercial looses a lot of it’s power.

Ronald McDonald didn’t get my ass into McDonald's either. A bitch is actually a wee bit frightened of clowns. Those fucking yummy assed fries are what did it. And I take responsibility for that. Oh, and I bloody well paid for the privilege of eating those fries too. Sigh.

If we didn’t eat the stuff, do we really think they would still produce it? Honestly, it really is the same fucked up argument that is the foundation for the war on drugs! A bitch really doesn’t think dealers would be sitting on corners fretting about why no one wants crack if the crack heads stopped coming by to score. Nope, they would move on to the new drug of choice. Supply doesn’t exist without demand and fast food restaurants are no exception.

How long will the yogurt parfaits stay around if they don’t move? Are we being intellectually lazy? Are we once again seeking a scapegoat for our own lack of parenting and individual control?

Home Food

This one’s really simple. You are totally responsible for what you cook in your home. There are clever ways around being broke, too tired, too busy or just lazy. Try coupons, easy prep. meals or salad kits. And you can fry something every once and awhile, just not daily. Fuck it if you are gorwn - your ass can eat or not eat. But if you have chil'ren you really need to practice some denial and cut uop a fucking apple! My mother didn't teach me a damned thing about proper eating and I'm fucking paying a computerized program to educate me now. Shit! Do the chil'ren a favor and cut up that fucking apple or they may be taking about you lke this in 15 years on their blog.

Most people eat like shit. It’s a fact! Why are we cooking shit food? Is it because we want to eat like that? Then fine. But you may want to lead by example if you are a parent and choose to grill that pork chop.

A bitch is plagued by choices and consequences in this diet game. I can choose to eat the grease or choose to eat the salad. Chil’ren have no real choice. All they can do is bitch and they can only take that so far. Parenting, for lack of a better word, is a good thing. Teaching good habits and saying “no” can be life-altering acts of kindness. Broke parents have to do it all the time.

Either way, get off Ronald’s case! His new imagery will be giving this bitch nightmares for weeks…looks like he caught a fucking meth. habit!

15 comments:

Nemebabe said...

Oh God - I can't agree with you more. Like it is the fault of the fast food industry that we roll up to their windows.

I think the fact that we feed this crap to our kids (guilty BTW - I do it all of the time too, but I try to at least go to Subway) and then plop them in front of the television.

I want some Popeyes - the closest is a half hour away. Maybe since the boyfriend is in Jersey working for the summer, and the spawn is going to Louisiana until September I will make the trek alone. I am due for some beans and rice and chicken.

See - it's not just the tv that does it. Haha :)

CrankyProf said...

Preach ON. I'm responsible for what I eat and what I feed my kids. My kids -- I try to feed them well. Myself? Well, I'm rockin' the WW Points system myself. (Those last fucking fifteen are a BITCH-KITTY.)

I have four nieces. My four-year-old is on the "outs" with her cousins because we don't eat McD's but once a month -- MAYBE -- and her little ass doesn't have NEAR the collection of tacky-assed cheap Happy Meal toys. Part of the difference is my nieces watch Playhouse Disney 24/7. And you can't swing a dead rat without hitting a McD's commercial on Disney. No exercise + too much TV = chunky little kids. "I'm Lovin' It!" indeed.

(We won't mention the toys in the Happy Meals being little 'ho's-in-training BRATZ dolls, with their chucky platform 'screw-me' shoes, skank hoochie-mama clothes and too much make-up.)

Nemebabe said...

HAH! I know which dolls you are talking about - I have a bunch of toys on the sill here in my office, and I have one of them...I decorated her with mardi gras beads and it really looks like she is nekkid underneath the little beads. She's wearing a yellow crop top and booty shorts with platform sandals. It's the damnest thing.

dmfinny said...

Stop stealin my thoughts, girl!!

Seriously, I agree for the most part that what goes in your mouth is a matter of choice. However, there are things that make certain foods, or the way foods are prepared that make them compelling, namely sugar and salt. It's easy to get hooked on both, and that's what makes fast food such a draw. My mother used to maked red beans & rice every Wednesday, but it wasn't as tasty, in retrospect, as Popeye's (damn it!). Couple that with some salty-ass, highly spiced, deep fat fried chicken, and you may as well get the needle. Also, the government doesn't help. On WIC, you can get the corn syrup-sweetend cranberry juice cocktail, but you can't get a fruit-juice sweetened version. In the Flatbush section of Brooklyn, McDonald's accepts food stamps, but few people know (or take advantage of) greenmarkets that also accept food stamps, and dollars to donuts (preferrably Krispy Kremes, but only after the light goes on), the glad-to-have-a-jobbers working in the welfare office don't mention that.

Kudos on trying to adopt a healthy lifestyle. I'm right w/you, and a bitch has lost 50 pounds over the last 3 years. Fuck Weight Watchers, though (just for me), 'cuz I'm not confessing shit to anybody.

Peace from Brooklyn!

Eva said...

You are so right, it's about personal responisbility and parental accountability. I was looking at that segment thinking the same thing. Really, you would think Ronald McDonald was some type of god. I didn't know he had so much power! It's amazing to me how they always point to McDonald's as the reason kids are fat. What about the fact that PE is now something that MAY happen twice a week and that's if you are at a school that actually offers it and recess is 15 minutes and kids don't WALK to school any more. Why not look into putting those programs back into ALL schools. And please don’t get me started on the hours of Playstation, Xbox and Nintendo instead of going outside to play.

As far as home cooking, I always tell people that my mother's heart condition forever changed the way we (the family line, not just her children) eat. When she could no longer eat pork, fried foods and had to switch to eating I Can't Believe It's Not Butter in place of real butter and eating red meat, sodium/salt, etc. in moderation so did we. My mother already was a bit of a sugar nazi at least until after I left for college so even that we ate in moderation. That's how I am now with my children. As far as I'm concerned eating out is a luxury that happens once a month whether it's fast food or restaurants. But I do have to admit, every now and then the emotional eater in me will go stock up on some cookies, chips and ice cream. Funny thing though, after about day 3 my kids forget it's even there. Out of sight, out of mind.

It's Me, Maven... said...

ABB, I agree with you about the ridiculousness of these businesses having to make the "appearance" that they have contributed to the obesity epidemic here. Perhaps to a small degree, they haven't been especially forthcoming (in years past) with the nutritional content. Nowadays, everything is listed online, either at the corporate websites for these chain restos or at something like www.calorieking.com.

These buffoons who appeal to these businesses to well... stop doing the business which is so lucrative for them, all because why? WHY? Because for a good lot of people, they lack WILLPOWER to either roll on by and go elsewhere for a healthier meal or snack, or they lack the WILLPOWER to go to these places and try to stick to some healthy eating habits. French fries are french fries; they are not crack or heroin!!!

I see this with my own mother. I'll sometimes get her a box of sugar free Russell's Stovers. If you've ever eaten anything containing malitol, you *MIGHT* have a good idea of what the results would be if you were to consume a whole pound box of malitol-laden chocolates!!! "Why do you insist on buying me these?" She shrieks out, the day after she's shit herself. My response? "No one told you you had to INHALE the whole box in one sitting!"

These are the same idiots who are SUPPORTIVE of the idea of government regulating MORALITY as well. These are some scary scary times.

Brave New World, anyone?

goblinbox said...

Are we being intellectually lazy? Absolutely! That's what we do. Abdication of responsibility is an American goddamned pasttime and I have little hope of it stopping. Why admit you're fat because YOU made bad decisions when you can blame a legitimate business for unfairly ENTICING you?

Why, it's like a pedophile saying the child wanted him to do it! Intellectually lazy! Hah! In fucking denial, rather.

Excellent post, btw.

Mighty MaMa said...

Shit, I mean you cover all topics! Is there anything that gets past you??? Great post by the way! I don't eat MC DONALDs any advice for my fat ass???

Afroprof said...

As usual ABB, I agree with you. McDonald's shouldn't be sued for making people fat. I do wonder what McDonald's puts into its food, but I don't think a lawuit will make that much difference.

But here's where I disagree, on a couple of points. I'm a fat black woman. I eat at McDonald's twice a year, if that. McDonald's didn't make me fat. I've been fat all my life, and I'm also active, healthy, and happy. McDonald's can't claim any of that either. But the reason why I'm fat or thin, just like my age and sexual history, is nobody's business.

So I rankle a bit when being fat is equated with over-eating, or eating at McDonald's. I know plently of fat people who are healthy eaters, and I know plenty of thin people who eat fast food on a weekly basis. It's way too easy to be intellectually lazy on both sides - to judge fat people and their eating habits based on their appearance, or to judge thin people and their habits based on their appearance. Or white and black, gay and straight, etc.

It's good that people don't take their kids to Mcdonald's, though, if for no other reason than because the food is nasty. Why subject children to nasty food? On the other hand, I never ever discount the power of advertising.

Billy the Bootlegger said...

Hon’, you took the words right out of my mouth. And to me it seems that the whole “blame the suppliers” act is at its worst in America.
You people sue everyone for anything, and I bet that even you guys can see that it is crazy (I don’t mean to generalise) .

Most people are overweight because they choose to be, not because other people or businesses make them. It is time for some of us to take some freaking responsibility. You have the choice to eat healthy, you have the choice not to go to McDonalds for breakfast, lunch and dinner, you have to choice to go work out and you have the choice to keep your children from being fat. Your children are overweight, because of their bad eating habits and their lack of working out. Work on that! You are a role model for your kids, teach them to become healthy grown-ups. Home cook, like ABB says. Yes, most meals will take longer to cook, but if you’d just get your ass behind a computer, you’d be able to find tons of recipes which only take maybe 15 minutes to prepare. Fifteen minutes in exchange for a healthy, nutritious meal for yourself, your husband/wife and your kids. It seems to me that it isn’t a hard choice to make.

Jeff said...

I'm pleased to say I was eating an apple when I read this post. But honestly, if McDonald's ever started offering vegetarian food that has the crack-like taste that the rest of their stuff has, I'd be doomed. Doomed!

Afroprof said...

Audioholic said: "Most people are overweight because they choose to be, not because other people or businesses make them."

Really? I've been fat my entire life. And I don't remember anyone asking me ever if I chose to be fat or thin.

Although it's a bit off-topic, I see an interesting coincidence when it comes to judging people's behavior. Many American believe that gays and lesbians chose to be homosexual. Furthermore, the same Americans say that if gays and lesbians would just try really really to hard rehabilitate themselves, they could join straight society, be happy, and have babies just like the rest of the world. So, despite the recent studies showing that homosexuality is in a person's genes, many Americans still believe that homosexuality is a choice, that gays and lesbians should exert some self-control over their gay-ness. Whenever I hear I fat people can control their fatness with just a little bit of willpower, I think back to gays and lesbians and how the same comments are made about them.

Getting back to the point, it's intellectual lazy to judge fat people and their eating behavior based on their appearance alone. It really is, especially since we all have a thin friend or two who eats fast food on a weekly basis and never seems to gain weight. McDonald's certainly is not to blame for the extra pounds that Americans seem to carry.

But it seems to me also that Americans haven't actually been gaining that much weight. Life expectancy in the US has increased almost by 3 years in the last 50 years, though the average weight has increased 8 pounds. Americans are also staying active later into life. Better prescription drugs mitigate and improve the quality of living of formally fatal diseases and conditions, like diabetes, heart disease, stroke, and high blodd pressure. Isn't this something that Americans should also take responsibility for?

Billy the Bootlegger said...

Afroprof said: "Audioholic said: "Most people are overweight because they choose to be, not because other people or businesses make them."

Really? I've been fat my entire life. And I don't remember anyone asking me ever if I chose to be fat or thin. "

As I recall and as I see it on my screen I said "most people". You are probably not MOST people. Studies have showed that more than 73 percent of overweight people aren't overweight because they have a natural tendency of gaining weight faster or keeping it on longer. To me, 73 percent, is MOST people. I’m not generalising and I know that not all people are overweight because they choose to be. And even so, the people that do not chose to be overweight, can maintain a ‘healthy’ weight by dieting correctly and working out regularly. They will probably never be 60 kilos, but being thin does not mean ‘healthy’ by definition. Of course and extra few pounds can’t hurt, just as long as the weight does not compromise your health. When I say ‘overweight’ I mean a weight that is unhealthy for your body. And the fact is that MOST people are overweight, not because they have to, but because they choose not to change their life style. And don’t get me wrong, I know how hard is is to change habits, but it is still a choice you make.

Afroprof said...

Audioholic said: "They will probably never be 60 kilos, but being thin does not mean ‘healthy’ by definition. Of course and extra few pounds can’t hurt, just as long as the weight does not compromise your health."

On this, we agree. Thin doesn't mean healthy by definition. And carrying a few extra pounds doesn't hurt either. There was a well-publicized study discussed in the NYT that showed exactly that - people who are overweight and active live just as long or longer than people who are underweight, active or inactive. Again, there's a lot of new research out there showing that being fat isn't nearly as bad as many were making it out to be.

But here's where we disagree, and this will probably be my last comment on this issue. No one asked asked me if I ever wanted to be fat, just like no one ever asked thin people if they want to be thin. But many thin people think they are choosing to be thin, however, by exercising regularly and eating healthily.

But, and this is a big but, many fat people do the exact same thing. We eat nutritionally diverse diets and we exercise. And we're still fat. Yes, fat people eat at McDonald's. But so do thin people. And the outside world doesn't get freaked out about that, that thin people are eating fast foods and remaining thin! American society fixates on externalities (in a celebrity-obsessed, superficial, isolated kind of way), on things like race, gender, age, body size, and (dis)ability. And yet, I always thought how weird it was that a culture obsessed with celebrity and unattainable standards of outer beauty can also be as obsessed about personal responsibility. Like it's my personal responsibility to achieve something that, if not physically impossible, is physically harmful, emotionally damaging, and completely isolating.

So getting back to the larger point, I rankle and continue to rankle about the assumption that only fat people have made McDonald's a super rich corporation, because only fat people eat there. What I eat is no one's business, and, for this reason, I don't support a lawsuit on McDonald's. I think that thin and average-sized Americans should know that they and fat Americans have a great deal in common.

dok73 said...

I agree with the ABB on one side, but if those idiots allow people to sue them, then they need to get new lawyers or pay the money.
Anybody with any sense knows they make the choices, and if they're cagey enough to get these giant corporations to give them money for bullshitting then they deserve the money and they need to send me info on how I can get paid too...