A bitch watched the recap of the Oscars red carpet parade with extreme annoyance. Every year people seem to get more and more Stepfordized.
Same color choices.
Same hair style.
Same would be hot if she/he had a soul but lets not pretend that she/he wasn’t selected to match the outfit date.
Gawd forbid someone dare attempt an individual expression of style! Oh, hell no…the style police hunt that poor motherfucker down like an angry village to an overfed vampire. This year’s hunt featured one of my favorite people, Andre Leon Talley. I adore him...really...but he still represents a level of enforced fashion-based conformity that makes a bitch want to hurl.
I’ve felt this way about music for some time. Oh, some original artists have been able to sneak through the filter but they are the exception to the rule. News that American Idol is opening a camp to more efficiently mass produce their “product” makes my skin crawl.
The thing is that the majority of people reward this behavior.
“Why did she wear that?” …as if her wearing that was a deliberate statement to you…an insult…a “fuck you and your future chil’ren so I decided to wear this shade of yellow just to offend you” kind of slap to the face.
“Oh my Gaaaaaaawd, did you see her hair?” …as if it’s 1983 and celebrities are living out some twisted John Hughes meets Heathers nightmarish popular girl from hell social reinforcement fantasy.
Jesus to Gawd, didn't a bitch earned a pass on round two of that shit?
Gasp as dawning horror descends.
Holy mother of retro gone bad, mayhap this is the re-birth of the 1980’s.
Think about it, chil'ren!
Overwhelming social pressure to conform to a boring ass norm.
An escalating nuclear crisis.
A super power at war in Afghanistan.
War-like tension with Iran.
Meryl Streep delivering Oscar nominated performance after Oscar nominated performance.
Can a bitch get my old metabolism back?
Any time between 1982 and 1987 works for me.
The Police got back together, Arnold is Governor and Paula Abdul has a career.
Damn it, anything is possible!