Thursday, October 06, 2005

A scientific miracle and the art of cleaning money...

Hello chil’ren!

This bitch was thrilled to hear about the successful breeding of a Tom Cruise and a Katie Holmes! Isn’t it amazing what medical science can do today? And, since postpartum depression doesn’t exist in their world, parenthood should be one big fucking dream. Go with Gawd, TomKat and your future kitten! The world always needs another fucked up and angry with the world child of celebrity train wrecks. This bitch is thrilled that Frances Bean will not have to walk down that road alone…

Moving forward…

2 cups coffee followed by Splenda and just a dash of 1% organic milk, 1 Claritin, 2 Sudafed and cigs…

When Dumb People happen to a Good Hustle…
This bitch is savoring the tangy media morsel that Roy Blunt got down and dirty with Tom DeLay and diverted funds to Matt Blunt’s campaign for Governor of Missouri…allegedly. Matt Blunt, our pasty Confederate Flag adoring Governor, is already drowning in dismal poll numbers but it still brought a smile to this bitch’s face. Being connected to this wanna-be John Gottiesque scandal couldn’t have happened to better piece of shit!

However…a bitch is pissed off on behalf of money launderers around the world! Millions of sanctified, Gawd fearing, long skirt wearing, bible toting, James Dobson worshipping Missourians are going to forever connect the skill of money laundering to this sorry assed example of it.

These sorry assed motherfuckers made dollar for dollar transfers from convention party funds to state campaign funds…allegedly...dollar for fucking dollar, chil’ren! This is a perfect example of the crisis our education system is in! Folks don’t even know how to hide illegal money transfers or launder illegal contributions anymore! Carlo Gambino is spinning in his grave.

If you are going to be slick with the cash the least you can do is clean it through a bakery or sub shop before sending it to your cronies! And, for the love of all that is holy, do not send the exact dollar amount you received from one illegal account to your cronies account!

A bitch is disgusted. These assholes aren’t even good crooks. Shit, even Nixon’s minions moved Watergate payoff cash through several accounts before paying it out!

Oh my Gawd! Has it really come to this? Is the neo-con version of the Republican Party really so fucked up that they are making Nixon look smart?

Oh, the horror!

5 comments:

notfornothin said...

i predict an unfortunate miscarriage in 5-7 weeks.

Maidink said...

I saw "medical miracle" and I thought you meant the successful regeneration of the flu virus of 1918.

You meant the OTHER miracle? The immaculate conseption. Or is it emasculate?

Maidink said...

I have to proofread my comments better.

Mr. Brian said...

So the whank cup and the turkey baster worked, did it?

It's Me, Maven... said...

Heheheh... I didn't know that being one of those Scientologist "chaperones" also included being someone's Turkey Baster-Wingman!