Tuesday, May 10, 2005

A Philosophical....

I've noticed that there is a connection between strict conservatives who obsess over the "gay agenda" and gay strict conservatives. Mr. Oh So Fantabulous and I have discussed this before. There is a connection between the leaders of the anti-gay movement and gay anti-gay politicians. Something about hating the "other" a wee bit too much. You know what I mean. Gay bashers are almost always trying to hurt the gay within them.

See, your average neo-con is not very self-reflective. Everyone else is sooo wrong about everything that these poor souls are bogged down with pointing out the faults of others. No time to look deep within their own soul and see the truth within. The analyst within me is curious as to whether there is a little avoidance being practiced with all that rhetoric creating. Something like, the more Condi pontificates the less she thinks about...Hmm.

Before you conclude that this is a new phenomenon exclusive to gay anti-gays, let me remind you of the late and not great Sen. Strom Thurmond. Yes, chil'ren, the theory applies to other neo-con favorites. Strom hated deseg. with a passion. As a matter of fact, he used that annoying Senate tool...what's that thing called????? Oh, yeah! The filibuster to bitch for something like 20 hours about black people peeing in the same toilet as whites.

Strom’s Journey Into Hypocrisy
Strom gets married
Strom hires a pretty young black maid
Strom gets some ass
The maid comes up pregnant
Maid's Baby's Daddy, Strom, does a Jefferson and turns a blind eye
Maid confronts Baby's Daddy Strom and Strom gets to cutting checks
Baby looks just like her Daddy (damned shame, too)
Strom gets concerned that his white chil'ren may pee next to his brown child
Strom filibusters until his veins collapse
Strom runs for President on the segregation issue alone
He doesn’t win (thank you JESUS/DIVA/DEVINE ALL SEEING ONE)
Strom lives too long and dies to quickly (racist bastard)
Baby comes out of her Jeffersonian closet as the illegitimate love child of a Southern segregationist Senator, oh my!

ABB's Theory of Conservative Hypocrisy
At the point at which a neo-con person's protests against "a thing" are greater than said person's perceived relation to "that thing", that neo-con person is revealed to be "the thing" to which he or she has been protesting.

TahDah!

7 comments:

disgruntled said...

LOL...

Tiger Lilly said...

ha ha ha ha ha ha!!

So true and funny!!

Clipgirl said...

Brilliant! You should become a politician. You could form your own party and call it the ABB Party. The media will ask "does this stand for Anybody But Bush?" and you can respond with a "Hell, no! This is the Angry Black Bitch party!" I'd vote for you.

Scott said...

Youthinks James Dobson protests too much?

The Divine Ms. Jimmi said...

I have always known the guys who scream "fag" the loudest really want something in thier mouths.

It's Me, Maven... said...

Reminds me of what my former father-in-law (who was Jewish) said to my WASband (regarding me) when we got engaged:

"They're okay for 'practicing on,' but don't marry them."

PS: I agree, ol' Strom didn't suffer enough when he exited-stage-left.

GN said...

What's really going on: these motherfuckers are setting up a feudal system. You know, the kind where the lords and ladies get to control every aspect of the serfs' lives: their labor, their wealth, their religion, their marriages, their sexuality.

In a feudal system (some similarities to plantation slavery), only the serfs really have to follow these strict moral dictates; the lords and ladies can party it the fuck up! Midwives and holistic healers can be drowned for heresy and religious abomination, meanwhile the lord can fuck any and everything moving in the manor without anyone batting an eye.

Same here: the serfs had better not step outside of the strict confines of "morality;" meanwhile, Cheney's gay daughter gets to think up ways to use her own sexuality against Kerry during her father's campaign and the Bush Crime Family parades its gay ho in the press corps, in the White House, in Christmas "parties" (cough, orgies, cough).

Wonder when the peasants are going to wake the fuck up?