Tuesday, October 06, 2009

Pondering the company you keep with Theo the sorta-beagle…

A bitch woke up to a stormy and rainy morning today…so naturally, Theo the sorta-beagle was shaking his ass off in response.

Sigh.

This dawg is not a rain dawg at all. The only thing worse than witnessing Theo’s skake fits is having him attempt to climb into my t-shirt with me. Note to self…trim that sorta-beagle’s nails!

Mercy.

Anyhoo, in an effort to distract Theo from his storm-based fear, a bitch settled down to read some sports…

…only to have a mini-nightmare my damn self!

Rush Limbaugh is in some sort of partnership to buy the St. Louis Rams
.

Yeah, I didn’t give a flying shit either. Hell, a bitch was surprised to learn the Rams are still around…wince…but something captured within the Limbaugh story chilled a bitch to the bone and damn near had my ass shaking like a sort-beagle in the midst of a rain storm.

Limbaugh’s alleged partnership is with a certain Dave Checketts…of the Checketts Group, which owns my beloved St. Louis Blues hockey club.

Gasp.

And Limbaugh called Mr. Checketts “Dave” in the article…like they are tight or something…like they are homeboys from way back in the day and regularly gather in Cape Girardeau for beer and sing alongs of racist jingles while dancing ‘round burning crosses in Limbaugh’s back yard!

Good Gawd, Dave Checketts!

A bitch had no idea there was less than one degree of separation between my Blues and that rancid evil rotting from within and stinking with it knave from Cape Girardeau!

Christ, what if Limbaugh’s hatred of all things decent and good rubs off on my team?

What if my fear that ig’nance is indeed an infectious disease is proven true by an outbreak of Bigotted Asshole over at Scottrade Center?

Shit.

Well, I’m not having it!

Limbaugh can do as he wishes with the Rams…they can’t be fucked up anymore than they already are.

But he needs to keep his cloven hooves off my hockey team!

Shit.

A bitch can only pray that the NHL’s diversity efforts will act as an asshole repellent toward all things Limbaugh.

Blink.

***logs off to shake alongside Theo the sorta-beagle while chanting "Hockey is for Everyone"***

7 comments:

Rileysdtr said...

Hey - your Blues beat my Red Wings twice last week and you're worried about Rushie? Ha.....

Shark-fu said...

Yeah, that was OUT OF CONTROL! Sweden...hockey...two wins for the Blues over the Wings.

Sick coolness...and Lawd knows I don't want anything to fuck up our groove. That includes Rushie!

Did I mention that the Blues wins were OUT OF CONTROL on the awesome scale?!?

Wink.

Erika said...

Hilarious!

Dusty said...

Lawd woman..The Oxycontin poster boy should not be allowed to own a sports team. He doesn't know shit about being a team playa.

I did love this line:
But he needs to keep his cloven hooves off my hockey team! Woot! touche' Shark Fu! ;)

Ella said...

I adore your blog. You're amazing. :D

(Also, horrifying that he might be dabbling in hockey.)

Anonymous said...

Fuck yea on the Limbaugh comment, but the way I hurt when it's raining makes me wonder if Theo has arthritis. You might want to check that.

awb said...

Ownership is subject to a vote by the other 31 owners so I don't know exactly if he has a right to buy and own a team. However, I would imagine that many NFL owners are probably down with Rush Limbaugh just like his buddy Dave.

What will be interesting is whether Roger Goodell, the commissioner who has made it his mission to improve the image of the League will let a openly racist scumbag own a team. Several players and their union head have already made their thoughts known. Whither Roger Goodell?