Thursday, July 03, 2008

Fourth of July Preparedness…

A bitch has been fussed at by my beloved Canadian readers for missing Canada Day on July 1st.

Wince.

My bad, people…this bitch has been busier than a bitch should ever be!

Anyhoo, Happy Belated Canada Day!

Speaking of national holidays, a certain flurry of sale-based television commercials tells this bitch that the Fourth of July is upon us.

Oh, and the fact that it is tomorrow…and that's the day before my brother Bill’s birthday…and it is listed in bold on the calendar of my newly refreshed planner inserts.

Blink.

Shit!

A bitch has a three day weekend.

Shark-Fu’s Last Minute Fourth of July Preparedness List of Shit…

Munchables
Ice cream…a sometimes food and my sometime is this weekend!
Grillable beasts
Sauce for grilled beasts
Mustard Potato Salad from Straub’s (Why front? Potato Salad is not my strongest dish…but I do adore it with barbeque…YUM!)

Beverages
Hmmmm, let’s shake it up a bit.
Fizzy cran
Fizzy grape cran
Vodka
Ice

Wink.

Viewage
Season 2 of Homicide Life on the Streets (bless you, Netflix)

Lone holiday-based burden
The neighborhood chil’ren & their trifling parents who insist of setting off gunshot-esque firecrackers all fucking day long and throughout the weekend...fuck it , well into the month of fucking September...even though firecrackers are illegal in St. Louis city and just so happen to make my dawgs freak the hell out and they are also a fire hazard.

Fuckers.

Sigh.

But, other than the Boyz in the Hood sound effects, this is going to be a fantabulous and relaxing holiday weekend (wink).

Have a safe Fourth of July, y’all…

8 comments:

Unknown said...

With the underemployment rate hitting 9.9%, I find it hard to celebrate anything as my son is part of that group.

But I hope you have a nice relaxing 3-day weekend Shark Fu..and like your dogs, mine have been going nuts for a couple of days now..and my cats are all hiding under my kingsized bed..its friggin crowded under there with as many rescued felines as I have! ;)

BOSSY said...

Bossy doesn't think you're describing July 4th, Bossy thinks you are describing Heaven.

Yankee, Transferred said...

Me loves some Homicide: Life on the Street.

ChristopherM said...

We have had the illegal fireworks going off here on my in-transition street all week. I actually saw a grown-ass man standing near his child while the child held a damn Roman candle (mind you, this child couldn't have been more than 6). Sigh. It's all fun and games until somebody loses an eye. Am I a bad person for hoping said eye is attached to said dumb-ass parent?

Happy 4th, Bitch!

Unknown said...

This comment starts because a.evilredhead's late father served in WWII. He never liked fireworks that sounded like mortar or gun fire. The pretty ones, he was all over, but rocket fire, not so much.

Go figure.

I can only imagine some of Iraq veterans have the same issues and therefore if they are illegal in your area, don't buy the damned things!!

Laura in L.A. said...

First, wishing a very Happy Birthday to dear Brother Bill! :):)

My dawg and I will be sending Joyous Fourth wishes to you and yours from the West Coast! Your planned day sounds sublime.

Love, Laura and Daisy

Friðvin said...

I only knew about Canada Day because one of my vendors is in Toronto. Between them being closed on the 1st, and us being closed the 2nd-4th, not much happened this week!

Happy 4th!

Bobby_2010 said...

Well, I'll be in the Nation's Capital for this years fourth...but I'm not even sure I wanna celebrate it this year...I'm away from all of my family, and then I just think about all the crap that is not worth celebrating...but your day seems quite fun..I'm gonna fry mine..but everything else seems about the same as mine...enjoy!!

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