A bitch has noticed a…well, a certain increase in inappropriate public displays of anger amongst the masses.
Some folks have indulged in verbal malfunctions during joint sessions of Congress involving the crass braying-esque screaming of accusations towards the President of the United States...willfully demonstrating a lack of home training usually found at certain movie theatres this bitch tries to avoid going to because everyone and their mother knows the regulars like to talk back to the screen too damn much. Note - this behavior can also be found at pre-schools 'cause toddlers are just beginning to get their home training on.
Other folks have all but cried out for a correction-based intervention by taking to the stage during an award show and babbling on about how one pop stars video was better than the award winner's video.
Lawd, have mercy.
Now that shit is more intense than a classic home training fail. ‘Tis more along the lines of a public declaration that the individual involved has lost his damn mind and needs professional help (wince)...stat.
This outbreak of home training deficiency got this bitch thinking.
These people could all use a semester of Bitchitude 101.
Yep, these people are crying out...loud as a motherfucker...for lessons in the proper ways to manifest anger.
And damn it I’m not the right angry black bitch to show them the path to glory.
So, a bitch is now offering one-on-one bitchitude training sessions.
For an unreasonable fee, this bitch will counsel those suffering from Home Training Deficiency Syndrome on how to appropriately share their anger.
If the individual completely lacks home training…we're talking about home training levels below 100 here...umm, well a bitch will have to charge an installation fee and then there’s a monthly maintenance fee for that shit too.
But it’s totally worth it…big time!
The whole world will thank them for getting help...trust a bitch on that.
Plus, it’ll help finance a bitch’s dream trip to Sweden to see the St. Louis Blues play ice hockey and then pitch my Absolut Bitchitude idea to the vodka gods.