Thursday, October 04, 2012

Post debate ponderfication – the good, the bad, and the reasons some of y’all need to calm the fuck down

Shall we?

The first presidential debate took place last night.

Romney did well.

Translation – he came across as human (not warm or anything but…well, human-ish like a newer version Cylon)…cough…twas aggressive in a “wildcat” kind of way, and he landed more punches than he took.

President Obama did not do well.

Translation – he came across like he was a 3,000 year old vampire who hadn’t feed in at least 1,500 years.

The good?

If you’re going to shit the bed, shit the hell out of it!  

Obama’s performance was just bad enough that he won’t be able to bullshit himself and that means he’s more likely to listen to advice and make adjustments.

Coping thought for the masses – Fritz Mondale won the first debate with Reagan in '84, but I seem to remember 4 more years of rule under the spawn of Satan that was The Gipper.

The bad?

Romney is gonna get some love after last night’s performance.

Catch the knee…catch it!

He is…and it’ll be amplified way out of proportion by a political press corps that clearly was bored to shit with his campaign and feared 30 more days of it. 

Prepare thyselves for several days of blah, blah, blah.  Tis the nature of the beast and you know damn well you’d be doing the exact same shit if Obama had come out there like a 3,000 year old vampire who just ripped off the Denver Blood Bank.

Coping thought for the masses – this is EXACTLY the kind of “oh shit, this campaign ain’t over!” kick in the ass that the liberal base needed!

Pause...sip apple juice...continue.

Flock o’ bitchitude, presidential debates are a lot like the Stanley Cup Playoffs.

Lots of analysts make all kinds of predictions based on how each team looked going into Round One.

But in the end, only one team raises the Cup…

…while the line for humble pie wraps around the rink.

Up next - VP Joey B. v That Congressman Who Wants to Take Food Out of My Disabled Brother's Mouth...


Chromobot said...

I just found this GOLD and I am not letting go of it! I just had a LAUGH OUT LOUD moment for real! I am a fan of Angry Black Bitch until my eyes bleed! HAHAHAHA!!! Amazeballz!

Unknown said...

Ultimately it's going to come down to how people feel about Obamacare. Although healthcare reform is absolutely necessary it is politically volatile. It will fare well for Obama's legacy but possibly not so well for his Presidency.

Anonymous said...

Thanks for some perspective :)

Yesterday was just an all around downer day - locally, nationally, globally.

The Texas Rangers blew it.

The debate speaks for itself.

Turkey and Syria are not playing nice.

I was so sad when I went to bed. At least I was able to not be boohooing, but just barely.

Keep on bitchin' - we need the role model :)

Cheers from cowtown,


Anonymous said...

I did not view the debate, however I foresee Romney winning. Congress must keep the white man in power and in the presidency. Forgive my pessimistic perspective, but I never believed Obama was here to make a difference he was only a facade of possibility that change could occur. America is a capitalist country, democracy takes place when people create change as a collective. We as a nation need to remember who controls the wealth in this country, no corporation will change their policies and how they do business for the 99%.

Mark L said...

Hilarious! Thanks for framing the election by showing us just how ridiculous the other side is. Romney, like many rich white male Republicans, appears so out of touch with EVERYTHING that a vote for him seems laughable to me. Sadly, the under-informed may vote in his favor just 'cause he isn't African-American Obama, who the media has been intent on portraying as some scary foreign bogeyman out to destroy Mom, the flag, and apple pie. Sigh.

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