Monday, November 28, 2011

Tis the season...

This bitch spent a fantabulous week at Brother Rob Thurman’s farm in Kentucky!

Lawd, I haven’t been this relaxed since…um…wince…clearly my ass needed a rest.

Anyhoo, it was beautiful and spending the holiday with friends on the farm was just what I needed.

I’m just now catching up with the news. Just as I suspected, the world is still taking a shit in the middle of the room.

Shall we?

The morning news shows are telling me that today is Cyber Monday and folks are supposed to get their online shopping on because…well, because because damnit!

I’ll confess that I do not understand folks diving in to a shopping experience like folks dive into the day after Thanksgiving or the Monday after the holiday weekend or [insert day near a holiday that advertising agencies have successfully created a legend around to convince folks to spend, baby spend lest the heavens fall and dinosaurs rise to roam the land again]. It just doesn’t look like fun to me…particularly when it comes complete with the very real threat of physical violence.

But it is what it is…and many an American will come to work today sporting bruises like a hockey player in the middle of the NHL playoffs.

Now is the time of year when morning television offers up a rather freakish menu of warm fuzzy Humans Are Nice And Giving stories with a selection of Holy Shit, Humans Are Greedy Violent Shopping Zombies side dishes…and a luscious desert of You’re Fat or You’re Going to Get Fat Off Of One Huge Meal And Then The Zombie Shoppers Will Eat You.

I love how everyone gets sorta-decent this time of year…’tis much like the save-the-date post-turkey shopping shit.

It’s as if folks glance at their calendar and note that they have an appointment with consumerism on Friday and they need to stop being a wretched shit for a month.

Pause…sip coffee…continue.

Maybe this year Cyber Monday will get into the swing of things with a full on digital brawl over 50% discounted blue-ray blah blah blah.

Blink.

3 comments:

Peterr said...

I love how everyone gets sorta-decent this time of year…’tis much like the save-the-date post-turkey shopping shit.

I think it's a holdover from childhood, when every year, 'long about Thanksgiving, someone says to their misbehaving kids "you better shape up or Santa will bring you a lump of coal."

Those kids may be adults now, but I think some still hear that voice in their heads anyway.

And, as was the case in those childhood days, that voice will disappear at about noon on Dec. 25th.

charmngbilly said...

very glad to hear you've had some rest and restoration.

the bewilderness said...

My heart breaks for them. Knowing that the only chance that you have of getting your children the thing above all others that they have wanted more intensely and consistently all year means struggling against other parents who are trying to do for their children what you are trying to do for yours.
I remember it very well and back then it was nothing like what it is now.