I believe in a higher power and I respect those who do or don’t. As a founding member of The United Church of Bitchitude and Latter Day Drunks (wink), I often ponder the state of the world and why people seem so hell bent on seeing other people suffer. Longtime readers know that I take issue with legislating faith and mixing organized religion with government…but I also find fault in mocking the beliefs of others while demanding respect for one’s own. Tis intellectually lazy and juvenile too...and a key commandment of The United Church of Bitchitude and Latter Day Drunks is “Thou shalt not practice intellectual lazitude.”
In that spirit, I’m about to take issue with Michele Bachmann for her announcement during a campaign stop in Florida.
“Washington, D.C., you’d think by now they’d get the message. An earthquake, a hurricane, are you listening? The American people have done everything they possibly can. Now it’s time for an act of God and we’re getting it.”
That shit fails to pass the Spock Test of Logical Logic, damn it!
Bachmann isn’t the only public figure who likes to interpret natural disasters as messages from God...and, like the others, she’s thinking in the now and ignoring the multitude of nature-based drama and trauma that happens during conservative administrations or in conservative states or to conservative man-on-woman sanctified with oily ointment families and so forth and so on.
Beyond that, the Earthquakes Mean God is Pissed faithful are missing the message that rancidity sends to those who have lost everything – God was pissed and you are collateral damage so suck it up or take a long look at your life ‘cause you may have lost your house/wife/dog/son/daughter/business/mementos as punishment for your adoration of porn/feasting on food/using naughty language/getting frustrated with your kids/talking back to your parents/[insert other thing that some have determined is evil while others interpret it as not so bad but disaster prophesies are more that willing to interpret as the reason why the earth shook last week and then Hurricane Irene hit the East Coast hard as a motherfucker].
Oh, who am I kidding…the Bachmanns of the world don’t give a shit about logic.
The Bachmanns of the world hear of a natural disaster and immediately start thinking through the potential political points they can score with their base who get off on that shit and honestly believe that bad things are punishment and good things are a reward and thus…wait for it, ‘cause this is the thought process they apply to everyone struggling with poverty, want, and need…
…thus, those who struggle do so because they aren’t godly enough and those who prosper do so because it is the will of God.
Dust off those hands and cease all that volunteer work, donating, and/or activism, folks!
‘Cause the Bachmanns of the world have come up with a guaranteed hustle to absolve themselves of ever having to give a shit or give back or care or mourn or do as humans do when natural disasters hit.
Shit, Michele probably watched the hurricane news with smug ass confidence, tisking and tasking those heathens on the East Coast for whatever they did to earn the wrath of God.