Let’s jump right on in!
Tyler Perry of the Madea creating and performing Tyler Perrys has a new movie out…featuring Madea. I Can Do Bad All By Myself is his latest offering (wince).
Full disclosure – a bitch can’t stand Madea.
The only thing I dislike more than Madea’s shuffle and jive antics is the fact that lots and lots and lots of people keep paying to see that predictable as hell and ig’nant with it bullshit.
I secretly hope that Perry’s box office is actually the result of the same 500 people going to watch his movies over and over again…but something tells me that there is an audience for Madea and it is loyal as hell (wince again).
But hey, there was an audience for Amos and Andy too…
…that don’t make it right.
Tyler Perry has a franchise with Madea…he has a formula...a recipe, if you will.
Some ingredients for a Tyler Perry Madea film include...
1 cup one dimensional cheating and evil with it devilishly bad black man
2 cups black woman gone wrong
3 gallons Live and Let God
1 cup unappreciated hard working blue collar black man looking for a “good woman”
2 cups chil’ren acting out because they aren’t being raised in the church
2 or 3 famous black people/singers
Mix any three ingredients or all that shit up first and then toss Madea’s ass up in the bowl, stir and bake and serve up to the masses.
Ta da – you’ve got yourself a guaranteed to get shit reviews but make lots and lots of money film!
Now, a bitch isn’t trying to piss in Tyler Perry’s flavorless Corn Flakes.
He has a hustle and that ain’t my damn problem.
What is my problem is that Mr. Perry has been tapped to adapt and direct the film version of Ntozake Shange’s 1975 play “For Colored Girls who Have Considered Suicide When the Rainbow is Enuf".
Pause…wait for the screaming to quiet down to intermittent sobs…continue.
Although he's no masterful director, my specific issue is with Perry adapting For Colored Girls.
I’ve done nothing in this life to deserve having the man behind Madea fucking up For Colored Girls and I have little doubt that he will fuck it up.
Hell, I’m hoping for a miracle here, because For Colored Girls deserves the very best or nothing at all.
That’s right, I said it – there is no need to bring just any version or a man’s version or the version y’all could get bankrolled of For Colored Girls to the screen!
Have we learned nothing from Beloved?!?
There are so many people who have no idea what For Colored Girls is…who have never seen it performed, never witnessed it’s power or experienced it’s beauty.
Those folks deserve better or nothing.
And a bitch can’t help but wonder who the hell decided that Mr. Perry was the right person to do the job.
I’m pretty sure that money is behind the reason why a woman wasn’t given the nod to direct it (and behind Perry’s selection of black celebrities with more name recognition that talent to star in it)…but that don’t make that shit right.
And I’m betting that Mr. Perry’s ego is behind his getting to adapt For Colored Girls.
Well, this bitch can do without Tyler Perry’s take on a womanist classic.
I can do bad all by my damn self.