Friday, June 30, 2006

Next!

Okay, so a bitch watched the entire Star Jones Reynolds interview on Larry King last night.

It was like watching one of those shows on Discovery Health Channel where they show a brain surgery…and you sort of want to switch the channel, but you just can’t.

Yeah...just like that only no internal organs where removed, dusted off and reattached.

Anyhoo, ABC sent Larry their talking points and position statements…Star Jones Reynolds clearly decided to play it cool, calm and collected…and a bitch was left shaking my head at the television screen.

Quizzicals Specific to this Public Display of Ego-based Celebri-drama…
Was Star told she was getting the boot in November of last year or April of this year? ABC said they told Barbara in 2005 to kick Star to the curb…so why didn’t Babs give her the boot? Just who the hell is driving that bus, anyway? And why would anyone want to go on multiple television shows to discuss the who/what/when and where of their firing?

Uh, uh…not in this lifetime…never.

Why does Star Jones Reynolds sound like she’s out of breath? It’s very disturbing…like she just ran up and down a flight of stairs…or is about to collapse. Is she not well…or is this inability to breathe related to the medical intervention that shall not be named by Star or anyone who wants to remain in Star’s good graces?

Did Babs get pissed off at Star for jumping the gun with her announcement…or did Babs get pissed that Star took a shit on plans to do one of those played out cheesy retrospective we’re gonna miss you shows? Or was the real trigger the fact that People Magazine scooped the Why Star Left expose?

People Magazine?

Oh Star! Please call a bitch because we really need to talk.

If Star Jones Reynolds was driven to inform her viewers of her firing by tabloid speculation where the fuck was the tabloid speculation? A bitch must be out of the loop, because my ass hasn’t heard shit about Ms. Thang since her wedding.

Tabloids were camped out in front of her house fretting over her employment status?

Really?

Lawd have mercy.

Is it me or did celebrity scandals used to be more fun?

Next!

5 comments:

moonrose said...

The lack of contract renewal made sense to me. It works the same in soaps. The November deal didn't make sense to me because I think April is when these decisions are made. Maybe it's just when they're announced. But from the time you know your contract won't be renewed, you have to work until your contract expires. Star's contract runs thorugh or until August. As in baseball, any party that terminates the contract before then may have to pay a monetary penalty, or if Star left, she might have to forego part of her salary or what have you.

VictoryCheese said...

That woman seems unhinged to me. But so does everybody on "The View."

Meg said...

A friend says that the reason Star sounds so out of breath is that she's wrapped up tight in some foundation type undergarment, and it's cutting off her oxygen supply, hence the breathlessness. I think that she can't get enough air through her phony smile. How DOES one talk while smiling all the time?

hollybygolly said...

She's all breathless because it takes so much energy to hold her head up with all that makeup, fake hair, and eyelashes. Even her TEETH have been screwed with since her "weight loss." Funny how that happens. WTF doesn't Stahh just cop to the bariatric surgery, plastic surgery, and whatever all else she's done? Livin' in DeNile.

Pandora said...

I've always been irked by the breathless thing too. She had it when she was very heavy and I figured it was because of her weight (knowing that when I'm heavy my asthma is worse). Maybe we could take up a collection for some asthma inhalers, seeing as the poor dear is now jobless.