One curious thing about autism is how large a role structure plays in the daily lives of many autistics. My brother Bill is extremely structured and routines calm him. Of course the opposite is also true…a change in routine throws him off and can be extremely upsetting.
So, the fact that Bill’s diet was just adjusted to deal with a couple of health issues…and the recent introduction of a new roommate…and the fact that they are digging up his neighborhood to repair roads...well, shit is throwing him way off all at once.
A bitch is thinking about this shit because my ass just read this report on the dangers of driving while distracted. Anyone who has ever been in the car with a young child can probably relate to what my ass encounters when driving my hyperactive autistic older brother on our visits. When he is agitated the level of drama just keeps going up…and up…and up, until you just want to pull over.
This bitch chooses to give it to Gawd, which is easier said than done. Let’s just say the giving of it to Gawd involves a freak out session of my own. A bitch likes to think the Devine One understands (wink).
These are the things folks just don’t know about. The little issues and concerns that keep popping up in my life that are troubling and somewhat amusing.
A bitch and C-Money encountered the massive road improvement project taking place in Bill’s neighborhood a few weekends ago. We had a 5 minute planning session about it, decided to drive the new route prior to picking him up just to confirm each turn and then my ass stressed about his reaction while driving back to his house to pick him up.
Bill was in good spirits when he got in the car. Keep in mind, C-Money had called and confirmed his new dietary restrictions the night before…and we had a planning strategy session about that shit too. So, Bill requested the usual…no surprise there…and we took off.
Bill started getting pissed when we took a left out of the subdivision…it used to be a right…and he grew increasingly more agitated as my ass continued to fuck with his routine by taking the long and meandering route to the main road. This bitch could literally feel my blood pressure rising. Stress was mounting. C-Money was counting Bill down into a more peaceful state…thank Gawd…but a bitch couldn’t help looking forward to the drama yet to come.
We pulled into McDonald’s…Bill’s favorite place. Bill hopped out and this bitch went to the counter to order his new and approved meal. Much to my relief, Bill seemed to not notice. A bitch began to speculate that he was agitated in the car because he thought he wasn’t going to get McDonald’s at all and that any fare from the menu was going to kick ass in his book.
He finished eating…ritualistically threw away his trash and the trash of a few customers nearby…and then we were off to the dreaded convenience store.
Our typical pattern was to pick up some snacks at the convenience store and then go for a drive. After parking and entering the store, Bill went to pick up his shit. C-Money had a hilarious back and forth semi-tussle with Bill over his beverage choice, which she won. Bill then attempted to use gestures and signs to negotiate some cookies. C-Money handled that shit too.
Bill seemed please to be getting any loot and took his losses at the hands of C-Money rather well.
We went on our drive and had a calm visit, which ended on time and without a tantrum.
A bitch didn’t give it another thought until my ass was reading about the dangers of driving while distracted. Suddenly, my ass was reminded of the unique complexity of driving while involved.
See, too many families have not found a way to stay involved in the lives of their mentally challenged loved one. It takes work, adjustments and support. A bitch knows too well that there are not a lot of support groups out there…and even fewer for sibling guardians like C-Money and this bitch. Yet the benefits outweigh the costs…and a bitch just wishes folks knew that.
A bitch stressed about that outing because my ass wants every moment in Bill’s life to be fantabulous…but change happens, stores close and roads need to be repaired.
The important thing was that we got through that drive…no accidents and no major drama…and we were able to be there and spend time with our brother.
Yeah, it takes work…but it will always be worth it.
We’ll just stay off the highway and within the speed limit and take those challenges one at a time.