A bitch is working on my second cup of coffee (bless the gods) and watching the Today Show…a special edition of the Today Show…Matt Lauer live at the New York Stock Exchange much like he’d be ‘on scene’ for a natural disaster.
They open up with a live shot of the horrific scene (in this case, the freakishly quiet almost vacant floor of the NYSE).
Lauer explains why he is there (“oh, the humanity!!) and lists off the carnage (the market has sunk to a 12 year low).
Then he brings in the sorta-experts…Jim ‘I’m a heart attack waiting to happen’ Mad Money Kramer and Erin “if this crazy motherfucker yells one more time I’m going to drop him right here on national television’ Burnett…and lets them discuss/debate/argue/yell/agree to disagree and ultimately say nothing of substance about the economy and what we can expect out of the markets today.
Moving fast, because Gawd forbid they take time to actually discuss a damn thing, Lauer tosses a lateral to Chuck Todd…who explores the Obama administration’s economic plan by discussing the latest cabinet nominee with a tax problem in less than 60 seconds.
Somehow the action swerves further off course to feature a smidge of the Rush v. Steele ‘does it matter who is driving the bus when the fucker is out of gas?’ flare up.
But before a bitch can even process how strange that shit is there’s Meredith V. chatting with Tavis Smiley about political accountability and his new book.
Lawd, there really should be a law against Fellini-esque morning television.