Wednesday, December 31, 2008

Don't bother, they're here...

Cough.

Shall we?

Isn't it rich?
Are we a pair?
Me here at last on the ground,
You in mid-air.
Send in the clowns.

Blago got his audacity on yesterday when he appointed a certain Roland Burris to represent Illinois in the Senate.

Blink.

Isn't it bliss?
Don't you approve?
One who keeps tearing around,
One who can't move.
Where are the clowns?
Send in the clowns.

Just when I'd stopped opening doors,
Finally knowing the one that I wanted was yours,
Making my entrance again with my usual flair,
Sure of my lines,
No one is there.

The political pundits are in frenzy over this shit and the implications of seating or not seating Burris.

Oh, and just in case a body missed the racial angle (as if!!), Rep. Bobby Rush flipped his flop and took it there at the press conference…big time!

Don't you love farce?
My fault I fear.
I thought that you'd want what I want.
Sorry, my dear.
But where are the clowns?
Quick, send in the clowns.
Don't bother, they're here.

So, here we are. Illinois lawmakers get to decide on impeachment…the legal community gets to debate whether this appointment can be blocked...the Senate gets to kick off 2009 with multiple shit-storms swirling about…and Blago gets his last laugh/major fuck you moment in the sun.

Isn't it rich?
Isn't it queer?

In many ways, 2008 was a year through which we wrestled with racial issues long neglected…and may saw Obama’s election as the end of our long national nightmare.

Losing my timing this late
In my career?

But we are so not post-racial, people.

And where are the clowns?

This move, though self-serving beyond belief, is a fine example of that.

And I can’t help but see this as the political move equivalent of a defeated general tossing plague ridden corpses over castle walls after a failed siege while yelling “Happy Fucking New Year, bitches!”

There ought to be clowns…

And some of y’all were worried that a bitch wouldn’t have anything to bitch about (wink).

...well, maybe next year.

Happy New Year!

Tuesday, December 30, 2008

My people call it fiction…

A bitch loves a good book.

Hell, I’m working on one my damn self…and I sure as shit hope that shit is good.

Pause...fret...continue.

I’m not working on Memoirs of a Bitch...mercy...and this bitch thinks the memoir may be in trouble after yet another publishing malfunction revealed a memoir to be a work of fiction.

Gasp.

This is more than just a failure of fact checking…or another author who has lost his damn mind...this bitch thinks it’s an example of the masses failing to properly appreciate fiction.

Blink.

Some of these memoirs exposed as fiction are really good works of…well, fiction!

But we like the fantastical to be real…to read about amazing real life stories of beautiful romance, foster children turn gang members turned authors or a million little pieces of recovery.

Those stories may be out there, but do they only work if they are true life fact infused memoirs?

Fiction kicks ass...sometimes an escape from reality is just what you need. A bitch can't help but wonder why people opt for the lie rather than admit that they wrote a good story and less than half of it really happened.

Mayhap it’s easier to promote a memoir and that’s why they are hot. A few sessions of media training for the author and they can send her or him forth to share their so false it sinks tale to the masses.

Or maybe the authors are assholes trying to make a dime and get fifteen minutes fast and easy.

Either way, my people call that shit fiction.

Fiction, for the love of all that's still a good read and should have been pitched that way!

Lawd, have mercy...

Monday, December 29, 2008

Pondering bridge building...

A bitch is recovering from my holiday feastitude and hopes y’all are too!

Let’s jump right in, shall we?

I caught the weekend political chats and something David Axelrod said on one of them made a bitch’s Afro hurt.

He was defending the choice of Rick Warren speaking at the Inauguration and said that the incoming administration looked forward to working with him and his on those things they do agree on even as they acknowledged the many things they don’t agree on.

The things they do agree on include fighting poverty in general and disease in Africa in particular.

Blink.

Now, a bitch has little patience with the way folks present the challenges facing the world as if poverty falls under one column and reproductive justice falls under another and never the two shall meet…or as if the battle over comprehensive sex education is on one side of the policy world and the fight against HIV/AIDS is on the other and those two don’t belong in the same conversation.

Lawd, have mercy.

But it occurs to me that this may be a teachable moment…for the incoming administration and for those who support bridge building with Rick Warren for the sake of bridge building with Rick Warren.

Pause...sip exceptional cup of coffee (yum!)…continue.

Here’s the thing…the Rick Warrens of the world aren’t using the same raw materials as we are.

I can just imagine this project.

We’re hammering and connecting shit.

They’re hammering and connecting shit.

But we’re using solid and proven materials like comprehensive sex education, condoms and family planning.

They’re using the structurally unstable and known to fall apart materials of abstinence-only education held together with a mixture made up of one half ‘condoms are bad’ and one half ‘family planning isn’t sanctified’.

Oh, we can build away on our bridge and eventually we’ll meet in the middle…but then what?

How far do we take this shit?

Do we walk across from our side even though we know we’re doomed to tumble once we put some weight on their structurally unstable side of things?

I’m curious as a motherfucker about what the plan is here, because you know and I know that you know and I know that bridge building dialogue for the sake of bridge building dialogue is the very definition of bullshit.

So, are we supposed to build this bridge to prove some point…to educate someone and walk them toward the bright light of reality?

Or is this project the intellectually lazy dialogue version of the bridge to nowhere?

‘Cause if it is, this bitch would just as soon take a pass and jump right to fighting poverty and disease with tools that fucking work.

Shit.

Wednesday, December 24, 2008

Holiday preparedness…

Lawd, a bitch has been so tired that I couldn’t seem to finish a damn thing!

I think the year is catching up to me…and add to that my annual case of the holiday blahs…oh, and the fucked up weather from hell…and suffice it to say this bitch has not been productive this week.

Shit.

But I woke up this morning with a holiday skip to my step and Elvis Costello, by way of Nick Lowe, playing in my Afro.

As I walk through
This wicked world
Searchin’ for light in the darkness of insanity.

I ask myself
Is all hope lost?
Is there only pain and hatred, and misery?

And each time I feel like this inside,
There’s one thing I wanna know:
What’s so funny ‘bout peace love & understanding?

ABB’s holiday preparedness list of needed things…

1. Food-based yummification
Morning feasting…
Bacon…’nuff said.
Potato to fry with onion
Eggs to scramble with cheese
Coffee…to wash down the yummification!

Mid morning sometime-food indulgence…
Apple pie…warm
Ice cream…cold and artificially flavored with vanilla
Bowl it comes in?
Guaranteed to be empty in a matter of seconds!

The Feast…
Asparagus drenched in butter
Creamed spinach…because C-Money digs that shit
Garlic mashed taters with butter goodness
Prime rib roast… Fall on your knees! O, hear the angels' voices!
More pie and ice cream unless I pass the fuck out after dinner…

And as I walked on
Through troubled times
My spirit gets so downhearted sometimes
So where are the strong?
And who are the trusted?
And where is the harmony?
Sweet harmony.

Cause each time I feel it slippin’ away, just makes me wanna cry.
What’s so funny bout peace love & understanding?
Ohhhh!
What’s so funny bout peace love & understanding?


2. Libations…
Wine
Whiskey
Vodka followed by grape cran
Sun Drop soda pop…because C-Money digs the hell out of that shit
Water…to hydrate

3. For the dawgs…
Bones...biscuits...and affection?

Check!

So where are the strong?
And who are the trusted?
And where is the harmony?
Sweet harmony.

4. Amusements in the cue…

C-Money and this bitch are currently on Season Three of Battlestar Galactica...and daaaaaaamn!

I don’t know how people managed to wait a week between episodes for them to resolve some of the shit that comes up on that show!

Hopefully the DVD gods will smile upon the House of Bitchitude and send forth new discs...stat.

Sigh.

Cause each time I feel it slippin away, just makes me wanna cry.
What’s so funny bout peace love & understanding?
Ohhhh
What’s so funny bout peace love & understanding?

Blink.

This bitch wishes the happiest of happy and multitudes of joy for all 'yall!

***logs off to continue getting my groove on***

Monday, December 22, 2008

So cold the air smells of ice…

Lawd, have mercy!

‘Tis wicked cold out there…frozen solid…so cold there’s ice on the inside of my car windows!

Shudder.

This is the kind of weather my sorta-beagles hate. They both are reluctant as hell to go outside and take care of their bitness, so this bitch has to keep a careful watch on them lest they find a warm corner and turn it into their personal dawg toilet. But one dawg's frigid torture is another dawg's dream come true…Sweetie the three-legged chow mix is thrilled that her thick fur can now be put to use and she’s taken to lounging on the back porch, nose held high as the bitter wind blows.

Sigh.

Dawgs are nothing if not diverse.

Anyhoo…shall we?

I tried to digest the news that the banks that received bailout cash aren’t tracking how they spend that shit…or are refusing to reveal how they are spending it …or are pulling some fucked up combination of not tracking and refusing…Lawd!..and my brain all but spit that data back out.

The mind can only take so much.

My first thought was about the responsibility of reporting back to a bitch…since I’m now an investor…on where the fuck my money is going, but that quickly gave way to a fierce wave of what-the-fuck pissed off wonder.

If banks aren’t keeping track of what they are doing with bailout cash, how the fuck are we going to evaluate whether the bailout infusion of cash accomplished anything?

Oh wait.

I get it.

There was a plan hidden within the lack-of-specifics non-plan bailout plan after all.

And trusting The Man with cash is like trusting a cold-hating, pee hording sorta-beagle to do the right thing.

Oh, they may surprise a bitch and go to the door, but odds are they’re trying to wait my ass out so they can pee on the carpet and stay warm while doing it when my ass is not paying attention.

Blink.

***logs off to shove dawgs outside for morning bitness***

Thursday, December 18, 2008

Pissing in Corn Flakes – The Round-Up…

Shall we?

A bitch read the news that Chrysler is shutting down 30 plants for a solid month and my stomach dropped. Lawd, have mercy…talk about pissing in thousands of bowls full of Corn Flakes simultaneously.

Shit.

This is one of those happenings when theory gets real…and this bitch wonders whether folks have any idea what we are all about to witness. Saying that car manufacturers should be allowed to fold and watching them fold are two very different things. Add to that the daunting problem of America’s major production-based product being consumers with 2/3rds of our economy being based on those consumers getting their spending on and…well, we’ve seen the good and the bad and we’re about to see the ugly.

Wince.

Onward to the Greatest Ponzi Scheme on Earth.

Friends shouldn’t let friends regulate friends.

Pause…consider…continue.

Mayhap that should be ‘the masses shouldn’t let friends regulate friends’?

And this bitch is beyond disgusted with the current pleas coming from those friendly regulators that Madoff misled the SEC. If assholes didn’t mislead investors what the fuck would the SEC do? And Madoff wasn’t even slick…not even sorta clever…hell, he didn’t even work up a good sweaty sheen trying to cover his bullshit up!

There were flies all over the place…a stench wafting up and about almost from day one...a dedicated investigator would have begun the search for the piles of bullshit immediately.

Fuck a duck on Sunday.

And finally, the selection of the Purpose Driven Bigot to offer up prayers during the Inauguration.

Mercy.

A bitch yields the floor to the fantabulous Pam of Pam’s House Blend

…and adds a dash of Katy Perry while pondering change.

Cause you're hot then you're cold
You're yes then you're no
You're in and you're out
You're up and you're down
You're wrong when it's right...

So much for a nice bowl of corn-based flakes...

Wednesday, December 17, 2008

By request, some thoughts on Oprah, the size of a person's ass and healthy happiness…

A certain Jason asked this bitch for my thoughts on Oprah’s recent weight-based confession.

Blink.

Jason, a bitch didn’t watch the episode nor have I had the chance to read the article. What I did see were several quotes and out-takes from Oprah regarding her disappointment in having gained back some of the weight she lost a few years back.

Now, I’ve been skinny and I’ve been overweight. I’ve listened to people judge others for that shit and been insulted regardless of the size of my own ass.

The thing is…and I think Oprah eventually circled back to this point…that folks need to be healthy. This bitch happens to think that the road to healthy requires the fuel of happiness and that happiness isn’t achieved by ripping into yourself because you’re carrying extra pounds.

Shit, when I'm unhappy I'm far more likely to eat sometime foods all the fucking time and in large quantities!

And there’s nothing less attractive than a person mouthing off about how fat someone is or how some celebrity has let it all go to hell…and when a body turns that superficial shit on themselves 'tis just sad.

Cough.

This bitch’s "ah ha moment" regarding weight came when I faced surgery for fibroids several years back. I gained a lot of weight…some of it due to meds and a lot of it due to a serious affection for dulce de leche ice cream (yum!) and all things fried. And I said a lot of unattractive and sad things about myself. But when I sat in a hospital waiting to go into that operating room, the size of my ass was the last thing on my mind…and you can bet your ass it didn’t return to be top of mind when I was blessed to wake the fuck up three hours later.

Sigh.

Yeah, I’ve been skinny and full of figure and everything between.

And I’ve been fine as hell through it all (wink).

It just took a healthy dose of reality for me to really realize that.

Mayhap Ms. Oprah is working toward achieving a healthy happiness as she strives to achieve a healthy weight/appearance/shape for her ass.

One thing's for sure - if she feels like everyone is talking about her weight she need only look at the dieter in the mirror for the source (wince).

Tuesday, December 16, 2008

Pondering Dickey C.’s reflections…

Oh, I’m all alone now
No love to shield me
Trapped in a world
That’s a distorted reality...

This bitch caught the teaser segment on ABC News this morning for Vice President’s Cheney’s exclusive reflection-based interview that the network appears to be spreading across their entire news line-up for all its worth…and Reflections by The Supremes popped into my head.

Sigh.

Dickey C. is reflecting on his eight years in office and laying claim to the policy of torturing terror suspects, saying that…wait for it!!!...9/11 has been his prime motivation for most of the programs the administration gave a green light to.

He went on to add that 9/11 changed him and his thoughts on what was appropriate to do in defense of the nation.

Blink.

And a bitch can’t help but wonder at that admission and Dickey C.’s apparent inability to see in the mind of the other the same logic he’s tossing out in his own defense.

Fear…the natural instinct to protect family and home…the willingness to go beyond the borders of previously held values because you believe the enemy has no values or limits and is capable of anything and everything…all that has been used to justify all manner of atrocities since humans stood up and built a fire.

But that don’t make it right.

Sigh.

Damn if this isn't an example of how easily those in power fail moral tests and how all their justifications fall apart in reflection...

...where a glance at the mirror reveals the monster you fear most staring right back atcha.

And the whole world was watching.

The whole world was watching...

Monday, December 15, 2008

Cold as hell...

A bitch is fucking freezing!

15 fucking degrees and a sheet of ice on everything?

That shit ain't right.

And now I have to go outside and warm up Ms. Sister Girl Cabrio so we can slide our way to work.

Shit!

Bitchitude shall return this evening...when a bitch can put on my flannel and thaw the fuck out.

Friday, December 12, 2008

The proof is in his hair?

Have y'all heard the news that Big Rod is crazy?

Blink.

Mmmhmm, and...allegedly...the proof is in his hair.

Lawd, give me strength.

Brother Rob Thurman breaks this shit down.

Go on with your bad self, Brother Rob!

Thursday, December 11, 2008

Felonious politics and the need to keep this shit real…

Shall we?

A bitch was hoping the anticipation would last longer, but damn it all if Rep. Jesse Jackson Jr. didn’t fess up to being Candidate #5 during a press conference yesterday.

Blink.

Rep. Jackson is not the focus of this corruption investigation and he denied sending emissaries to see Big Rod to pitch a pay-to-play deal in the Great Illinois Senate Seat Auction of 2008, but this bitch predicts his dream of joining the Senate is now over.

Pause…crack knuckles…continue.

This bitch is more than a little disturbed by an emerging theme surrounding the political drama in Illinois. Many a talking head has presented Illinois as some rare state where corruption has gone wrong…as if pay-to-play was conceived, birthed and permanently resides in Illinois.

And that, my friends, is bullshit.

I’ll give them that Illinois has had a series of juicy scandals, but no one should look at this shit as an Illinois problem.

If your jaw dropped…if you cursed under your breath at the clumsiness of it all…if you are disgusted by the stupidity of an elected official already under investigation chatting his ass off in bug-able places and allegedly discussing all manner of illegal activity in the Governor's office…Lawd, have mercy...and you happen to not live in Illinois, then you need check that better them than us attitude and get real about the role back-room dealing plays in politics everywhere.

Every fucking where.

Shit, North Dakota beats Illinois by a long shot.

Cough.

I’m not defending this shit.

I just don’t see any benefit in anyone thinking bold ass felonious politics is as unique to Illinois as Chicago style deep-dish yummified pizza.

There, but for the lack of a federal investigation, go far too many states...

Wednesday, December 10, 2008

And all that jazz…

Confession – the soundtrack for Chicago is still running through a bitch’s Afro in response to the Great Illinois Senate Auction of 2008.

Sigh.

Anyhoo, this bitch caught the tail end of a news report on Big Rod’s big drama that mentioned a certain Candidate #5 of the numerous candidates vying for the open Senate seat in Illinois. Allegedly Candidate #5’s emissaries said they could raise up to a solid million for Big Rod…mayhap for his own Senate run…and that they were willing to give the Governor something tangible upfront.

Blink.

Find a flask
We're playing fast and loose!

A bitch is obsessing!

It's just a noisy hall
Where there's a nightly brawl!

Who is Candidate #5?

Who are these emissaries?

What tangible thing were they willing to offer up?

No, I'm no one's wife (wink)
But, Oh, I love my life!

Lawd, this hot mess of a political scandal is going to take a lot of people down…hard, face down and onto cold concrete.

And all that jazz…

Tuesday, December 09, 2008

He only has himself to blame…

This bitch was listening to NPR while driving to work this morning and heard the breaking news that Gov. Rod Blagojevich was arrested on corruption charges.

The Governor of Illinois?!?

Oh my…how not shocking.

I must confess that my first reaction was pure jealousy. Well, it isn’t fair! Illinois gets all the federal corruption investigations of sitting Governors! And now it looks like they’re getting an impeachment too while certain Governors are going to ride off into the sunset come January indictment free despite their scandalicious behavior.

Couldn’t Mr. Fitzgerald spread the love a little?

Shit.

Anyhoo, based on the press conference it would seem that Big Rod had it coming…he had it coming…he only has himself to blame!

Sorry…my bad…that damn song has been in a bitch's head all fucking day.

Cough.

Pat Fitzgerald of the bring Scooter Libby to sorta-justice Fitzgeralds held a press conference in which he read from the wiretap transcript, replacing all those alleged “motherfuckers” and “fuck him”s with “bleeping” and “bleep him”s.

Pause…consider…continue.

And shouldn’t those have been motherbleepers?

What?

I’m just asking.

The political pundits are now scrambling to uncover possible links between Obama and Obama supporters and anything Obama related and the now indicted Governor…and a bitch awaits the fruit of their labor...but my ass was struck by the alleged use of phrases like “fuck him, that motherfucker” by Big Rod in response to the Obama team’s alleged apparent unwillingness to pay-to-play with anything more than their gratitude.

As someone who regularly uses phrases like "fuck that fucking motherfucker", I can tell y’all that the phrase isn’t a term of endearment and probably speaks volumes about the nature of the response to Big Rod's "show me the motherfucking money!" Senate appointment pitch.

Time shall tell.

Either way, this is one hell of a fucked up drama hitting Illinois just when they need it least.

And ain't that a fine mess to kick off the new year with?

Shit.

***logs off singing My kind of town, Chicago is a bitch's kind of town! in a desperate attempt to get the soundtrack from Chicago out of my Afro***

...like bears at the zoo.

Let’s jump right on in, shall we?

The economic news continues to be grim…so much so that this bitch had to turn the news off the other night and watch several hours of Discovery Health Channel programming followed by some Animal Planet. Nothing puts life into perspective like learning about a woman who was pregnant for 46 years and then watching surgeons remove a…well, I won’t spoil it for you and you might be eating, but trust a bitch that Discovery Health is a fantabulous avoidance tool.

And don’t get me started on Animal Planet…talk about drama!

Anyhoo, there is no way this St. Louis based bitch could avoid the news that Anheuser-Busch InBev is cutting 1,400 jobs…most of them from the St. Louis area. We knew this was coming…the merger earlier this year created a lot of overlap…but the timing is fucked given the job market and the reality that market isn’t going to get healthy anytime soon.

Sigh.

I woke up this morning thinking about the current state of things…the proposed government sorta-loans and the housing fuckeduptitude…and I’m reminded of wild animals wandering into suburban neighborhoods to forage for food.

The suburban sprawl continues to creep into bear territory…the bears learn that there is food to be had from garbage cans and such…and authorities keep rounding up bears and flying them back into the wilderness only to have them wander back in time after time.

People start freaking out. Some call for population control...others try to come up with new and improved garbage cans…and the bears keep coming down from the mountain to get their forage on.

The cycle continues… because no one wants to discuss the reasons for why those bears are strolling through the ‘burbs.

Shit, we’ll start killing off bears before we consider hitting the brakes and addressing the question of whether we need another subdivision out in what used to be bear country…whether building that subdivision is a wise economic decision or whether it makes more sense to rethink the definition of growth and mayhap rehab an existing neighborhood in the city.

Instead we continue to do what we’ve been doing because there’s no doubt on the winner in a growth versus bear battle…

…and this bitch fears the American worker will soon be on exhibit in a zoo and damn near extinct in the wild.

Lawd, have mercy!

Mayhap a bitch should rethink falling asleep whilst watching Animal Planet.

Blink.

Monday, December 08, 2008

Pondering the Chicago sit-in...

A bitch saw a news report on the worker sit-in at Republic Windows and Doors and…well, wow! The story is getting a lot of play and this bitch thinks this worker action is an example of the reality many workers face in these fubaristic economic times.

The workers were laid off with three days notice and no offer of severance or vacation pay. Their bosses blame Bank of America for not extending credit. Bank of America says that they are not responsible for Republic Windows and Doors responsibilities as an employer. And this bitch is thinking that this shit is exactly why most of us are fucking disgusted with the bailout epidemic currently breaking out in Washington.

Between the lack of home-owner considerations in the first bailout plan to the general disregard towards worker protections in the current proposals, there is a serious disconnect between the proposals to stimulate the economy and the creation of plans that actually reach workers who are the engine that will actually stimulate the economy.

And I don’t give a flying shit if some CEO is working for a $1 a year…show me that motherfucker’s complete compensation plan, which I suspects is oozing money.

Fuck.

And the workers of Republic Windows and Doors continue to occupy the space they labored in while their demands for economic justice are met with shrugs and denials of responsibility.

This reality…the worker’s reality…is what we need to consider as our government tosses billions at companies without so much as a “go fuck yourself!” to address the workers at those companies who will be left out in the cold when the money machine goes off line.

Shit rolls down hill...

…and picks up speed along the way.

Friday, December 05, 2008

The Bleeding Deacon Grand Opening…

What?

The Bleeding Deacon Grand Opening

When?

Saturday, December 13, 2008 6:00 PM to 1:00 AM

Where?

4123 Chippewa St. (Just West of Gravois Ave.)

The Damage?

‘Tis FREE!

And there will be complimentary snacks and drinks!

A bitch had the honor of stuffing myself at The Bleeding Deacon a couple of weekends ago and it was fantabulous!

By request, a rant…

This one’s for Margaret in Bangor…who has promised a bitch hot chocolate if I ever visit!

Shall we?

Ed Rendell put his foot in it when he said Janet Napolitano was perfect for her new job in government because she has no life.

But Rendell said what a lot of people think about singles in general and single women in particular – we have no life so we have tons of time and few personal obligations.

If a bitch had a dollar for every time someone has said shit like that to me I’d be able to fund a fucking bailout.

Well, I call bullshit!

And the people saying it should know that it is bullshit…unless they actually spent their single years sighing and fretting over when they’d partner up and thus get a life.

Shit.

Breaking news – I have a life!

A bitch may be single but I sure as shit have a family.

Gasp!

Pause…roll eyes…continue.

Now this bitch knows that conservatives has been busting ass for years trying to define “family” as one man and one woman joined in sanctified marriage with at least two kids, a mortgage and a pair of chocolate labs, but if this bitch waited for those assholes to get a fucking clue I’d be a damn fool just like Ed Rendell is a damn fool for thinking Napolitano’s single status equals a lack of a life which will then make her the perfect workaholic for her new job.

Lawd, have mercy.

The worst thing about the comment is that it ignores the accomplishments of Napolitano and folks like her working in government who get the fucking job done and balance having a life with service…

…but a bitch doesn’t need to hear a chorus of crickets to know that shit won’t be acknowledged anytime soon.

That'd be too much like right...

Ooooh Canada...

Longtime readers know that a bitch adores Canada.

Not only is there great hockey…and Tim Horton’s…and an abundance of Smarties…but Canada also has some of the best political theater in North America!

Blink.

What?

Did y’all think we have the only show ‘round?

Shit.

This bitch has been following the drama facing Canadian PM Harper and my ass is fascinated. Harper is on the ropes now that Liberal and New Democratic parties have joined Bloc Quebecois in an attempt to unseat Tories…so Harper has suspended Parliament!

Daaaaaaaaamn.

Confession – a bitch has always been a wee bit jealous of that dissolve government and no confidence shit. That would have come in handy as a motherfucker down here...more than once...sigh.

Anyhoo, this bitch wants details!

What’s the status?

What’s going to happen?

Is this a good thing or is all hell about to break out?

And when is the price of Smarties going to go down (wink)?

Thursday, December 04, 2008

A Bitchfirmation for Fal…

For Fal, because you asked.

Shall we?

When my father passed away I struggled with a lot of things. I wanted to be angry...to scream and shout and vent, because my time with him was too short. I wanted to mourn as the ancients did…to wail and moan and beat at my body until my physical pain equaled my emotional pain. And I wanted everything to stop…for motion to cease and time to stand still until the storm in my heart settled.

But time didn’t stand still.

Life moved on with freakish normalcy even though everything in my world was anything but normal.

I woke up one day with a song playing in my mind…one of my favorite songs from church that I used to sing while standing beside my father so many years ago.

I feel like going on.
Though trials come on every hand.
I feel like going on.

I hummed it as I prepared to start the day and I sang it in the shower, as tears of blessed remembrance blended with the water washing over my face.

Though the storm may be raging
And the billows are tossing high,
I feel like going on.

I sang while driving to work…and suddenly I just pulled over and knew, even as I sat in a car on the side of the road, that I wept out of love for a most extraordinary man. And I found the fuel to go on.

Though trials come…

Let yourself feel.

Let the tears flow.

On every hand…

For you will find that you can celebrate a life even as you mourn the loss of it.

I feel like going on.

And you will.

Tuesday, December 02, 2008

Stuffy of nose and oily of stomach…

A bitch is feeling illish…stuffy of nose and oily of stomach.

Shit!

Oh well, ‘tis the season for colds and such.

Wince.

Let’s jump right on in, shall we?

This bitch took the weekend off from everything so my ass is catching up on the sorta-news…and Lawd have mercy!

Pondering the attacks in India…
I’m always amazed by how the press is unable to report on a world event without filtering it through a narrow American perspective. In the case of the attacks in India, the media frenzied about whether these attacks were launched Al Qaeda…and that’s understandable, since they were coordinated and multi-locational.

But to stop there...to get hung up there and then gaze about frantically in obvious confusion when your own expert consultants point out that it might not be that simple?

Well, that’s just fucked up and frustrating as hell.

Breaking news – other countries have internal and external threats that are different from our internal and external threats!

Is it too much to ask for an exploration of the complexity of it all?

Can a bitch get some background information, for the love of Reporting 101?

***cue crickets***

Shit!

Pondering the Wal-Mart stampede…
Lawd, have mercy!

A man was trampled to death when doors opened at a Wal-Mart for post Thanksgiving Day shopping. Let me say that shit again…a man DIED!

And people went on shopping.

Hell, they demanded that they be allowed to continue shopping…’cause they had waited in line for several hours.

Blink.

What the fuck, people?

This wasn’t a food riot outside of a United Nations relief drop. This was an opportunity to shop at a motherfucking Wal-Mart!

Fuck a duck, what the hell could you possible need bad enough to continue to get your shop on after…of fuck it.

Save money maybe but "live better" my black ass...

Monday, December 01, 2008

Pondering World Aids Day...

I remember the first time I heard of Aids and saw images of those suffering from it flash across the television screen.

I remember friends lost…the hateful rhetoric of those who saw their death as God’s judgment…the courageous activists who have taken us so far…the marches and protests…the songs and poems…and the continuing presence of Aids in the world.

And I circle back to the fact that every day is World Aids Day.

Every second…and we must place a priority on treatment, research and education.

Every hour…and we cannot afford to continue to think of Aids as someone else's problem.

Every day…and we must discuss of Aids impacts our loved ones and communities and act on that accordingly from a position of respect.

Every second...every hour…every single day.