Friday, April 28, 2006

Illish...


A bitch is feeling illish is taking the rest of the day off from bitchitude to indulge in misery and self pity.

If they can do a face transplant, why can’t they give me some non-sneezing motherfucker’s sinuses?

2nd Annual Cabaret Night Monday May 1 at AMP!

A bitch is too excited about this event! It involves two fantabulous things...theatre and vodka crans at AMP (wink)!

Check it out if you can and support these folks.

Advance tickets are available through AMP or by a reply email.

Who: DramaRama Theatre Co. with Bradley Calise, Nicole Trueman, Landon Shaw, Pam Reckamp, Bryant Allent, Uchenna Ogu, Kristen Robbins, Lisa Ramey, Vernon Goodman, and Kad Day.

What: 2nd Annual Cabaret Night to benefit DramaRama Theatre Co. & the Jonathan Larson Performing Arts Foundation. In addition to great music, there will be complimentary appetizers, drink specials, a silent auction, raffles, and door prizes.

When: Monday, May 1st, 2006. Doors open at 6:30pm, Cabaret at 7:30pm.

Where: Alternative Music Pub, 4199 Manchester Ave., St. Louis, MO 63110

Donation: $20 at the door, $15 in advance (cash, checks only)

Contact:
DramaRama Theatre Company
P.O. Box 5174
St. Louis, MO 63139
314-605-7788
Info@DramaRamaTheatre.com

Thursday, April 27, 2006

A bold package, my black ass...

Okay, a bitch has said it before…but these motherfuckers have lost their minds!

Jesus to Gawd, when was the last time our Senators filled up on gas? Some staffer needs to do the nation a favor, drag his senatorial boss out into the city…down the fucking street and round the corner to a gas station so he or she can see…with their own delusional and used to being driven around eyes…that a $100 rebate check won't accomplish shit in the face of $3 a gallon regular gas prices!

Can a bitch get an amen?

Sorry assed do nothing out of touch assholes.

If the Senate is paying money back for shit they’ve done wrong they need to call a bitch because their math is off…big time!

If they are tossing money back to ease my pain…my pain has a few more zeros attached to it and is listed under College Loans on the What Debt Collecting Asshole Currently Has Their Boot On My Neck list.

Mmmhmmm.

It costs a hell of a lot more than $100 to buy this bitch off.

My ass is thinking about investing in a bike and tell the whole gas-based shit to kiss my black ass.

If only they made a helmet that didn’t fuck up my ‘fro…

A brutal attack...

A bitch just read this...and my stomach turned.

Having lived in Texas for several years, this bitch is aware that racial tensions are ever tight and are currently high.

But, damn it all.

This just makes me sick.

A bitch is beyond words…and lifts this victim and his family up to the Devine One.

Mercy.

Not everyone can wear yellow...

A bitch remembers attending church as a child and observing a fascinating ritual. My mother would greet another woman with faux affection, exchange pleasantries and then move away. After achieving a certain distance she would turn to me and whisper…"My goodness, that blouse was unflattering on her. Not everyone can wear yellow.”

Years later, my ass thought of that shit and how amazing it was that my mother could see in fashion what she was blind to in life.

This bitch suffered a sleepless night. Yesterday, this bitch had a moment and the dregs of it are weighing on my mind.

Allow me to purge some of this drama, please...

As most of you know, a bitch is a mentor. Last night, a bitch was hanging out with one of them. It was clear from the beginning of the evening that this was going to be a ‘please just let me talk because no one ever does’ kind of night.

Suffice it to say that the topic was sex, the young woman was confused and she is the fourth generation of her women in her family to be confused. A bitch is trying to mentor her through the mine field that is teenagedness so that she will not continue the family tradition of teen motherhood.

This mentee...MT for the purpose of this rant…is in her young teens. Her grandmother was born to a 14 year old mother, her grandmother then had her first child before the age of 15 and her mother had her first child at 14.

A bitch has learned, through my years of volunteering with teen mothers, that giving birth to a child does not automatically educate the mother on all things related to getting pregnant and parenting. Public schools do not fill the void left by uninformed parents and the rumor-based speculation found on the street is beyond dangerous. Sadly, many young adults must learn about sex the hard way…and it often takes several ‘lessons’ to complete that learning.

Anyhoo, MT expressed to me that the sum total of her sex education delivered by her mother involved just not getting pregnant...just don't come up pregnant...just don't. She knew about the pill and the shot, but nothing about protecting against the multitude of sexually transmitted diseases ravaging St. Louis. Her mother told her not to get pregnant, but then added that if she did want to get pregnant she should do it in the 10th or 11th grade because then she may still graduate from high school.

Yeah...good times.

MT also related that she had a friend who got 'that shot' and then had sex with a partner who later tested positive for Syphilis. MT felt that the shot also protected her friend from all disease.

A bitch was freaking out by this time…totally overwhelmed with this onslaught of information, but aware enough to be grateful that this conversation was happening. Later, my mind would wander to the women who don’t have someone to talk to…someone who knows the facts or where to get the facts. Shit, someone who knows what they don't know.

Sigh.

So, after a brief overview of basic sex education…which included abstinence and the rest of the stuff behind door number 2…we settled in for a nice visit. The evening ended with MT expressing that she was glad she could talk to me and this bitch making plans for a visit to the educational library at Planned Parenthood.

Not everyone can wear yellow. Wanting to wear yellow...adoring the color yellow...doesn't mean shit if you look like you've got The Plague when sporting the color yellow.

Not every mother knows the facts. Not every father has the answers. Not every mother or father who is missing those facts and answers is a bad parent…and not every mother or father gives a shit.

Society pays a heavy burden for this debate. Sexually transmitted diseases are a public health crisis in St. Louis and many cities. Comprehensive education and the facts are not aphrodisiacs…and a bitch shudders to think of the what is being lost while we debate whether folks should be saved.

This bitch didn’t sleep at all last night because my ass was worrying about all these people trying to wear yellow who don't need to be.

Abstinence only education that falls back on the assumption that all parents are able to bring their chil'ren up to speed is going to leave some folks looking looking gorgeous and others looking like shit.

And a bitch thought we weren't going to leave any chil'ren behind....

Wednesday, April 26, 2006

The Selection of a New Press Minion - A Dream-based Thang...

Tony Snow’s new job as Press Secretary at the White House came as no surprise to this bitch. Lawd, this had to be the worst kept secret in Washington! Anyhoo, the buzzless buzz was shooting all over the place last night. A bitch took 2 shots of Nyquil and floated into a wonderful politics filled slumber…

ABB’s Dream-based Exploration - The Selection of a New Press Minion…

President Bush, otherwise known as Scooter B., sat in his office contemplating his calendar.

With a frown, he glanced at his schedule minion…"Why can’t I take another vacation? I’ve been working hard! This is hard work! And there’s brush that needs clearing. Shit, Cheney gets vacations all the time. Just because he fucking shot someone during the last one shouldn’t mean that I can’t go and clear my brush. Laura is handling the mid-term coat tail thing…Karl is on top of maintaining a climate of fear and chaos…the base just re-introduced a call to ban those gays from getting hitched, so the wedge issue is in the works…what the hell is still hanging out there that can’t wait two weeks!” with a fierce grunt, he spat on the ground.

The schedule minion sighed…"Sir, you really need to cease all that spitting! To answer your question, your polls numbers are in the toilet and no one thinks now is a wise time for you to go on vacation. Sir, most Americans can’t afford to fill up their cars with gas…the last thing they need to see is you kicking back and having a good time when they are suffering!” turning away in disgust, the minion mumbled…"I thought working for Naomi Campbell was challenging! Give me a sharp left to the head any day over this asshole!”

“Okay…fine…what the fuck do you need from me now?” ranted Scooter B. in an inpatient rush.

“Sir, Mr. Bolten is here to see you.” Replied the minion. “Your new Chief of Staff, sir.” He continued in response to Scooter B.’s blank stare.

“Oh yeah! Send him in!”

The schedule minion complied and exited the room.

“Boltie, it’s great to see you!”

“It’s Josh, sir.”

“It’s Boltie, you pompous son of a bitch! Boltie!” Scooter B. sneered.

“Fine. Whatever. You need to pick a new Press Secretary.”


“If I do can I go on vacation again?” Scooter B. asked hopefully.

“No.”

“What’s in it for me?”

“You won’t have to communicate directly with the press." clearly frustrated, Bolten's voice took on a harsh tone.

“Let’s do it! You’ve come to the right person, Boltie! I’m The Decider, after all!”

With a chuckle, Scooter B. settled down to…umm…well, decide.

“Laura! Everyone loves Laura Bush.”

“No, sir. Even if she wasn’t the First Lady, we need her on the campaign trail because she’s the only person associated with the past 6 years who doesn’t make the voters want to puke.”

“Harriet Miers!” Scooter B. shot back.

“No, sir. Have you lost your fucking mind?” was Boltie's…err, ummm….Bolten's alarmed reply.

“Ann Coulter? No, never mind…I can’t stand that nastified heifer. Umm, Hannity?”

“Sir…Mr. President? Decide, for the love of all that’s holy!”

“Fuck you! Give me something to decide on, asshole.” Scooter B. shot back.

“Fine. Tony Snow, asshole.”

“Hire him.” Scooter B. spat out, feeling decisive.

“Thank you, Mr. President.”

“That’s why they call me The Decider, Boltie.”

Turning and quickly exiting the office, Boltie…umm, Bolten was heard mumbling…"Decider, my conservative yes-man bullshit spewing ass.”

Tuesday, April 25, 2006

Allergyfuckticoughus Robustus and a learning moment...

A bitch is feeling ill. My allergies are out of control and my ass has made an appointment to see my doctor. This is huge, because a bitch avoids going to the doctor for shit like this.

Isn’t once a year enough?

Fuck!

Oh well, mayhap a bitch is getting old?...said pathetically with a cough followed by a wheeze.

Or, maybe this bitch has The Plague!...said with full on drama and a gasp followed by a wheeze.

Oh shit!

Didn’t some woman in Los Angeles stumble into a hospital with The Plague? Okay, so it wasn’t the cough spreading population eliminating Plague…shit, it was still a Plague...the people destroying and flea-based one.

Lawd!

Fuck it...it is more likely to be mumps. Thanks to Iowa being connected to Missouri, we’re in the midst of a mumps outbreak. If my ass has the mumps there is going to be hell to pay! This bitch endured the original shot and then went back for another a few years ago. In my world that should equal Mump-Free for Life (wink).

Still, a bitch would prefer the mumps to The Plague…big time.

Fuck it, allergies that feel this bad should have their own name. Ummmhmmm, something like Allergyfuckticoughus Robustus...and the meds had better kick some major sinus ass.

Moving forward...

A bitch has been happily trudging through my book. It’s been moving along nicely post topic-based revelation. Fantabulous!

This bitch has been avoiding my favorite pastime of reading...good shit. This bitch tends to get distracted by good reading, which would result in my own book never getting completed. So, my ass has stuck to re-reading trashy novels prior to bed.

Let me tell you, a bitch was more than slightly relieved by my avoidance of serious reading when my ass read about this shit.

Oh my!

A bitch was aware that writers could fall victim to suggestion…and to adoring the style of another writer and imitating it…but damn!

This bitch would be horrified and beyond embarrassed.

Pause and shift with alarming ease from sympathy into a completely self centered perspective on this poor heifer and her literary drama.

Actually, this fear of writing a book someone else has already written may work in my favor! A bitch could use this to motivate on through the final push.

Rub hands together and flash a Carvillian grin.

Yes…yes…this could work! No more reading other people’s shit until the first draft is finished.

Excellent!

Hell, this learning from the mistakes of others stuff isn’t half bad. It’s not as much fun as pure schadenfreude, but still…not half bad at all.

Monday, April 24, 2006

Al Franken is coming to town...


Al Franken and crew are going to be in St. Louis tomorrow.

This bitch’s invitation must have been misplaced…the e-mail address is angryblackbitch@... oh, fuck it.

Trust that a bitch knows where my ass sits on the liberal invite list and it is not in the 'must send' column...yet (wink).

Honestly, a bitch is grateful. On top of being bloated and puffy, this bitch is in the midst of a hormonal breakout and allergy cough fest from hell. Lawd, makeup has limits...even MAC!

Anyhoo, this bitch will certainly tune in and catch the show…while inhaling vanilla flavored frozen custard from Ted Drewes topped with hot fudge and multitudes of Smarties…all washed down with a vodka cran or two!

Ah, heaven...

Pondering the newest Blunt...

A bitch was sick with allergies all weekend, which has resulted in an extra sour mood.

Pollen can kiss my congested ass.

Anyhoo, this bitch has been pondering the news that a certain Congressman Roy Blunt adopted a little boy from Russia. Roy Blunt is the father of Missouri Governor Matt Blunt, who recently had a little bundle of joy with his fashion challenged wife Bunny.

Well, congratulations...

...but a bitch is curious about some shit regarding this adoption. Non-Missourians should know that Missouri is in the midst of a massive anti-choice assault. Certain Missouri law makers are attempting to remove sex education from the classroom…limit reproductive freedom…and generally force Missourians to use abstinence as the only acceptable form of contraception.

The constant thread among anti-Choice groups in Missouri has been that adoption is the option. When lawmakers introduced legislation to ban abortions in Missouri even in the case of incest and/or rape, adoption was again mentioned as the option.

So, a bitch received the news that Matt Blunt’s 56 year old father secured an adoption from Russia through a Texas-based adoption agency with some confusion.

Why not utilize a Missouri agency?

There are several. Here! How about this one or, better yet, this one.

Why not choose from one of Missouri's beautiful little bundles of unplanned joy?

What kind of message does this send to Missourians?

A conservative anti-Choice Missouri lawmaker...a Texas agency...and a Russian baby.

Hmmm.

Well, shit. It appears that choice is still on the table for Congressman Blunt and his new wife…even as his party moves to eliminate it for the masses.

Way to lead by example!

Congratulations.

Friday, April 21, 2006

Driving while distracted...

One curious thing about autism is how large a role structure plays in the daily lives of many autistics. My brother Bill is extremely structured and routines calm him. Of course the opposite is also true…a change in routine throws him off and can be extremely upsetting.

So, the fact that Bill’s diet was just adjusted to deal with a couple of health issues…and the recent introduction of a new roommate…and the fact that they are digging up his neighborhood to repair roads...well, shit is throwing him way off all at once.

A bitch is thinking about this shit because my ass just read this report on the dangers of driving while distracted. Anyone who has ever been in the car with a young child can probably relate to what my ass encounters when driving my hyperactive autistic older brother on our visits. When he is agitated the level of drama just keeps going up…and up…and up, until you just want to pull over.

This bitch chooses to give it to Gawd, which is easier said than done. Let’s just say the giving of it to Gawd involves a freak out session of my own. A bitch likes to think the Devine One understands (wink).

These are the things folks just don’t know about. The little issues and concerns that keep popping up in my life that are troubling and somewhat amusing.

A bitch and C-Money encountered the massive road improvement project taking place in Bill’s neighborhood a few weekends ago. We had a 5 minute planning session about it, decided to drive the new route prior to picking him up just to confirm each turn and then my ass stressed about his reaction while driving back to his house to pick him up.

Bill was in good spirits when he got in the car. Keep in mind, C-Money had called and confirmed his new dietary restrictions the night before…and we had a planning strategy session about that shit too. So, Bill requested the usual…no surprise there…and we took off.

Bill started getting pissed when we took a left out of the subdivision…it used to be a right…and he grew increasingly more agitated as my ass continued to fuck with his routine by taking the long and meandering route to the main road. This bitch could literally feel my blood pressure rising. Stress was mounting. C-Money was counting Bill down into a more peaceful state…thank Gawd…but a bitch couldn’t help looking forward to the drama yet to come.

We pulled into McDonald’s…Bill’s favorite place. Bill hopped out and this bitch went to the counter to order his new and approved meal. Much to my relief, Bill seemed to not notice. A bitch began to speculate that he was agitated in the car because he thought he wasn’t going to get McDonald’s at all and that any fare from the menu was going to kick ass in his book.

He finished eating…ritualistically threw away his trash and the trash of a few customers nearby…and then we were off to the dreaded convenience store.

Our typical pattern was to pick up some snacks at the convenience store and then go for a drive. After parking and entering the store, Bill went to pick up his shit. C-Money had a hilarious back and forth semi-tussle with Bill over his beverage choice, which she won. Bill then attempted to use gestures and signs to negotiate some cookies. C-Money handled that shit too.

Bill seemed please to be getting any loot and took his losses at the hands of C-Money rather well.

We went on our drive and had a calm visit, which ended on time and without a tantrum.

A bitch didn’t give it another thought until my ass was reading about the dangers of driving while distracted. Suddenly, my ass was reminded of the unique complexity of driving while involved.

See, too many families have not found a way to stay involved in the lives of their mentally challenged loved one. It takes work, adjustments and support. A bitch knows too well that there are not a lot of support groups out there…and even fewer for sibling guardians like C-Money and this bitch. Yet the benefits outweigh the costs…and a bitch just wishes folks knew that.

A bitch stressed about that outing because my ass wants every moment in Bill’s life to be fantabulous…but change happens, stores close and roads need to be repaired.

The important thing was that we got through that drive…no accidents and no major drama…and we were able to be there and spend time with our brother.

Yeah, it takes work…but it will always be worth it.

We’ll just stay off the highway and within the speed limit and take those challenges one at a time.

Another moment...

Now, a bitch is not fond of absolute statements and my ass strives not to make them...a work in progress, but at least a bitch makes the effort (wink). This bitch has not said…nor would my ass ever say…that baiting is the exclusive province of white straight men. This bitch has witnessed far too many examples to the contrary to go there.

A bitch does not seek to…nor does my ass currently…live in an exclusively black world. My life, my writing and my activism are not demonstrative of that shit. And a bitch does find it curious that folks go there whenever there is a discussion that involves race, class and/or gender.

A bitch fears that the current spin against the victim will cause other victims to pause or not come forward. By the time you finish reading this a woman will have been sexually assaulted and will have to make the decision to come forward, seek justice and begin the process of healing. Yes, a bitch is concerned that any false claim of rape…in any instance…has the result of staining any future accusations, which ultimately hurts the victims. All you have to do is observe how many Tawana Brawley references have been made in the last month to know how long lasting and detrimental that stain can be.

A bitch is also concerned with the response to this case…with the dismissive labels being slammed on the victim and the absolution being granted the accused.

Are the men accused in this case innocent until proven guilty? Yes, that is the legal standard. Will the state have to prove its case in a court of law? Yes, that is the legal standard too.

Does this discussion demonstrate that a smoldering fire is not an extinguished flame? Yes, we have a lot of shit to work on. And should the broader issues brought up by this case be discussed…should we examine what the various reactions to these issues say about American society today…should be seek to learn from this exploration and better understand our reality?

Yes.

Portland Places for People event...

A bitch is too excited about the Portland Places for People event coming up May 5th!

Jazz, an awesome organization with a fantabulous mission and food all presented in two historic St. Louis homes…oh, the joy!

Did a bitch mention the jazz?

Chil’ren, Places for People is having a fundraiser.

Places for People provides individualized, high quality and cost effective services to adults with serious and persistent mental disorders to assist them in living, working and socializing in environments of their own choosing. We accept a special responsibility to serve those individuals who rely on public funding.

For more information about Places for People check out their web site.

WHO: Places for People, Erin Bode and Kim Massie

WHAT: Portland Places for People, a progressive dinner party featuring three exceptional jazz performances in two historic homes for one very special cause – Places for People.

WHEN: Friday, May 5, 2006; cocktails begin at 6:00 p.m.

WHERE: In several historic Portland Place homes located in the Central West End.

TICKETS: Tickets for Portland Places for People are $175 per guest. To purchase tickets call 314-535-2310.

This bitch will be there volunteering my ass off in support of this fantastic organization…and listening to some great jazz, too (wink).

Wednesday, April 19, 2006

Shake it up baby, now!

Oh my!

A bitch's allergies have reached the cold-esque stage so this bitch has consumed some Dayquil just for kicks. Hyper doesn’t even begin to describe my current state of leg hopping agitation.

Anyhoo...

President Bush…Scooter B. to this bitch…has decided to re-chart that course he is so very fond of. It was announced today that Scott McClellan of the deny and redirect McClellans is resigning from his post as Press Secretary. CNN is also reporting that Karl Rove, also known as Bush’s brain, will not longer oversee policy development.

Well, okay then.

In one day Scooter B. has lost his voice and his brain. A bitch shudders to think about what he will think up flying solo.

Oh, the horror!

Scott McClellan will be missed. His press briefings were a joy…full of a level of bullshit based denial and spin that hasn’t been witnessed since to Nixon era. Scott has been a loyal minion…spewing forth the party line with a straight face despite the ever increasing shouts of bullshit and you’ve got to be fucking kidding me coming from the White House Press Corps.

C-SPAN must be inconsolable. Shit, even a bitch tuned in for the daily circus. Now…well, it just won’t be the same. Oh, we’ll still be lied to…but no one kept the lie alive quite like McClellan.

Sigh.

As for Rove, well a bitch is withholding judgment. Announcing that Rove will no longer dip into the policy development pool is one thing. Actually banning him from the pool area is another.

What a day.

Shit, what a 48 hour news cycle!

McClellan and Rove are being presented to the nation as a monumental shake-up, but this bitch is a believer in the buck and knows where it stops. Scooter B. is the self anointed Decider, so the train is still on course for a wreck as far as my ass is concerned.

Actually, this shit makes sense…which scares the shit out of me.

Scooter B. is booting McClellan because Scott clearly can’t handle his shit anymore. The spin will remain the same, but they are hoping that a new radio will make the same tired ass song list sound fresh and new.

Rove will remain in the mix, but they are attempting to create some distance in the hopes that the same policy tossed up by a different artist will result in a new shit splatter pattern.

Rumsfeld? Oh, now he has the full confidence and support of the Decider and Chief....umm, err...the President!

So much for cleaning house. Looks to me like someone is shifting a pile of dirty clothes to cover up the unmade bed and calling it housecleaning.

A bitch may have to pop some corn and settle in for this show...

A moment, please...

A bitch would like to re-state my position on comments. Please note that this bitch reserves the right to reject any comment that calls for or describes an act of physical violence against another comment maker.

Come on, now! Act like you’ve been raised!

Shit.

Moving forward…

We all need a moment. Fuck it, if you don’t this bitch does. Take a deep breath….hold it...exhale and repeat.

Ah!

Now...knees are jerking all over the place. This is a predictable thing…happens anytime anyone discusses those topics traditional etiquette classes tell us not to. The problem is tradition hasn’t gotten us very far.

A bitch is all about the debate. However, a bitch has noticed several comments that seem to be telling my ass what my experience is…what my reality is...what my history is.

And that pisses a bitch off.

Discussions about race as a historical factor to sexual abuse and exploitation are not an opportunity for ‘nice’ white men who have ‘never done anything like that’ and whose families ‘never owned slaves’ to seek absolution.

Sorry, but that dawg don’t hunt.

If my ass were discussing the exploitation of the worker by the corporation, would you feel compelled to tell me that you work at a corporation…that your family has always worked at a corporation and you reject the notion that any corporation ever exploited any worker because you and yours didn’t?

Come to think of it, a bitch did witness some of this shit during a Native American history class. My roomie, a Hopi, took the class with me. Day one…no kidding, day fucking one…a classmate came out with “What do you want, New York City back? I’m tired of being made to feel guilty for shit I didn’t do!”

My roomie’s response was classic…"Nope. Arizona will do just fine, asshole. And you can stop feeling guilty, because your guilt doesn't do a fucking thing for me.”

Anyhoo, this isn’t about the individual but rather the whole. Dismissing the experiences of others because of individual issues of guilt and personal experiences is intellectually lazy, deliberately limiting and not gonna play in this debate.

We can either sit around exclaiming about the healing properties of the scab…or we can treat the raging infection beneath it. A bitch is willing to debate the infection, but my ass will not start from the perspective of the wound not existing at all.

In conclusion, keep those comments violence free. The Man is a HUGE fan of this bitch and my file is already bursting like a motherfucker.

Tuesday, April 18, 2006

My fellow citizens...

...before this bitch addresses the recent news out of Durham, my ass has some follow-up shit to say regarding yesterday’s post.

This bitch is a firm believer in analyzing and understanding events and policies. If something goes wrong my ass thinks it should be studied to learn from that mistake. My political critiques are as much for my own educational experience and growth as for the sheer fun of bitchitude.

And this bitch believes that there is a vast bullshit based conspiracy out in the world to promote apathy and discourage action.

Mmmmhmmm, a bitch is serious as a motherfucker about this.

A bitch is talking about shit like those subtle hints posted on this blog that go on and on about how 'it just doesn’t matter' and how we all know that politics is corrupt so why bother trying to address the fucktitude within the system and why don’t we all just go out, have a cocktail and look down our elite liberal noses at the poor pathetic masses that are too stupid to know better.

Yeah, that shit.

A bitch doesn’t care if they claim to be liberal. They are, in fact, very dangerous and may even be a deliberate plot to pander to our intellectual ego (and we all have one) with the hope that we will grow weary of the struggle, abandon the causes that matter to us, grab that cocktail and let the whole mess go to shit.

This bitch doesn’t trust that shit for a second.

Why care? Because politics is local and impacts every single thing in your life! Every single motherfucking thing. This bitch doesn't have the luxury of apathy and neither do most of you.

Why analyze and critique? Because elected officials in all branches of government work for you…regardless of their party affiliation. You just did your taxes, which is the citizen’s equivalent of writing a fucking paycheck.

Your vote? Oh, hell yes…that shit matters. Just look at how aggressively the man tried to keep it from women and minorities…how they went to great lengths to break up organized labor and any political organizing that educated groups and registered the masses. No one fights that hard to deny an individual something that does not matter.

People died for your right to vote and this bitch has no time or patience with deadbeat citizens who willfully hand over the power of the vote by failing to utilize it.

And we all…every one of us…need to cease looking around for the great leader…for a political Messiah who will appear to lead the citizens to the great liberal promised land.

The power and the responsibility of the political process are ours. It’s time to take a long hard look at the citizen in the mirror.

This bitch feels the frustration, but wonders if those in power do. If we fall silent, they never will.

So keep those eyes wide open…raise that fist in the air…and participate in the process, be a part of the policy making process and reclaim this shit together.

Monday, April 17, 2006

Eyes wide open and fist raised high...

This bitch had an allergy attack filled weekend! Shit, living in an area surrounded by pollen spewing trees and flowers is awful this time of year. Just when my ass thought nothing would ever lift my sour mood out of the emotional dumpster…my Spring Smartie-based goodness shipment arrived from Canada! Yeah! Oh, the joy of Smartie yumminess in a box. Thank you, Jeremy from Montreal….thank you!

Moving forward, while inhaling Nestle Smarties as if they were candy coated chocolate popcorn portions…hold up...mmmmm, Smartie based popcorn…oh, hell yeah…oh, um…sorry (wink)...moving forward.

A bitch was pleased to see so many comments to my Uppity post. Contrary to popular belief, this bitch doesn’t have to be agreed with. A bitch hasn’t changed my mind, but my ass was pleased to see that the post stimulated an interesting discussion.

On a totally different note...

A certain GayProf of Center of Gravitas fame posted recently (The Truck) about the false sense of security present in many members of minority groups. The post reminded this bitch of a joke regarding the oppression ‘train’ and how it historically picks up sexual minorities, racial minorities and religious minorities (not always in that order) as if on a bigot-based schedule.

This got a bitch thinking about shit and my ass has decided to explore some of that shit here today.

During the 2000 Presidential Election, this bitch witnessed the Republican Party reaching out to gays, affluent and/or religious blacks, certain women and Hispanics. At the time a bitch was disgusted to see so many folks leap on the Republican train without solid examples of a change in policy. It appeared that people were so grateful to be invited to the conservative table that they forgot to ask if they would be allowed to eat. The passage of time has shown that invitation to have some serious small print exceptions…and a ‘fuck you’ clause that must have stung like a motherfucker.

Now, a bitch should be clear that minority groups do not participate in group think. The media may treat us like homogenous groups, but there are multitudes of diversity within any group that ‘the other’ often fails to see or acknowledge.

Having said that, oppression doesn’t give a hot damn about group think or internal diversity.

Fast forward to the 2004 election…and the local, state and federal push to ban gay marriage that was a foundational stone of the Republican platform. What is amazing is that many gay Republicans were only interested in legal marriage being protected from the social conservative tidal wave…and that was the very thing, if not the first thing, Republicans put on the chopping block to shore up their base.

One must not forget that the anti-marriage equality push was also utilized to reach out to black voters. Black voters are historically Democratic voters, but the Republican Party found a successful wedge issue in gay marriage. A bitch could go on and on about my disappointment in the ease of that manipulative maneuver, but my ass shall save that for another post. Suffice it to say, the Republican Party was successful by pandering to the surface morality of conservative blacks and they were particularly successful in bringing many working class blacks under the tent by dangling their new ‘the gays are coming…run for your lives’ carrot. Past successes were limited to affluent blacks, so a bitch has always imagine the RNC dancing a jig after seeing so many new brown faces.

And then they began sorta-governing by slashing social programs and school funding…and slashing health care…then moving on to slash student loan programs and housing programs…followed by the on-going drama of Medicare reform, which they had the audacity to position as particularly beneficial to black people because black men die younger than the national average…only to wind up with their collective heads up their collective asses during Katrina. And those heads have yet to come out for a breath of air. Now, where did that love go?

Which brings this bitch to the women who moved under the Republican tent in 2000 and 2004. The official Republican ‘fuck you’ is still unfolding for many ‘W is for women’ women. It is clear that the Republican Party is involved in a full frontal attack on family planning…and one doesn’t have to be a self identifying feminist to know that women are on the front lines in that battle. Yet, many 'W is for women' women see themselves as separate from the women impacted by the current administration’s behavior.

The ability for people to wrap themselves in the faux cloak of security is amazing…and dangerous. By the time you see the train coming…well, you might as well close your eyes and step into it.

A bitch sees brilliance in the ability of the Republican Party to pander to what we would like to be and distract from what we are. Anti-gay becomes anti-those other gays that we don’t hang around with anyway…anti-brown becomes anti-those brown people who work against my bougie image campaign…anti-woman becomes anti- those ‘loose moral having need to get married and attend church more like I do’ women…and anti-Hispanic becomes anti-illegal and giving legal folks a bad name…and anti-worker’s rights becomes anti-Communist…oh, and we all know that anti-war became anti-American quick as a motherfucker…and so on and so forth and the Republican ‘pander to your internalized hatred of self’ train just keeps on churning on until…

Until…anti-them becomes anti-you and your dumb ass wakes up to reality.

Oh, the horror!

Friday, April 14, 2006

Uppity...

This bitch is fed up with the fuzzy headedness inspired by consuming allergy meds in abundance. Shit, my car is covered in a thick coat of sneeze creating pollen. Nasty!

Jumping in between sneezes and wheezes…

A certain Kusala sent this article to a bitch regarding Rep. McKinney’s run in with a police officer while trying to enter a federal building. The article deals with the issue of why the Representative was stopped, which resulted in the whole incident, and the fact that Rep. McKinney may not have been recognized because of her new hair style. It then expands to address some ignorant assed shit some asshole said about Rep. McKinney. It was a pretty good read.

This reminded a bitch that my ass hasn’t addressed the Rep. McKinney incident.

To be honest, a bitch thinks that others have deconstructed the incident to the bone and rather well. However, it did call to mind the broader issue of uppity behavior.

Uppity is one of my favorite words and this bitch uses it in many ways. Uppity can be used jokingly…for example; C-Money can be a wee bit uppity when it comes to which hotel she will book. Or to condemn…that’s what so and so gets for being an uppity asshole. And it can also be used fondly…Lawd, a bitch just loves that uppity motherfucker!

And there are other uses too. How about…that uppity negro needs to remember his place or look at that uppity black girl acting so high and mighty. Uppity, in those instances, refers to class and privilege…to a black person’s place…to a black woman knowing and embracing her station in life, which is assumed to be lower on the class scale.

Words like girl, boy and even kid are still used to establish dominance, class and those all so desperate and sad 'places'. This revolves around power and the absence of power.

It is that shit that a bitch sees swirling around more and more with uppity as the diagnosis and conformity is the cure.

A bitch sees some of this in the coverage of Barry Bonds and his alleged use of steroids. Now, a bitch is a St. Louis native and has no love for Mr. Bonds…but it is that loyalty to the Cardinals that has this bitch pondering why Barry Bonds is under the media gun while Mark McGuire has a freeway named after him. Granted, McGuire didn’t lie in his testimony before Congress…but, in not lying, he basically admitted that he shot up while playing baseball. So what gives?

A bitch thinks the answer is within the uppity factor. Barry Bonds is unrepentant and has denied using steroids. Mark McGuire was solemn and skirted the issue. Bonds is seen as arrogant…McGuire is seen as a victim of a sport caught up in the allure of performance enhancing drugs. The uppity indictment greets Barry Bonds at every press conference, while silence has been married to Mark McGuire’s legacy.

This bitch thinks the whole scandal stinks to high heaven and baseball has some explaining to do.

Back to Rep. McKinney, who fiercely defended herself against the accusation of assaulting a police officer and was systematically shredded in the press as much for the arrogance of her defense as for the incident. A bitch thinks this has something to do with race and gender. The press likes women in public office to be soft…less declarative…less uppity.

And so we hear the undertone of that uppity black woman should have dropped her gaze and begged for forgiveness in their coverage.

Everyone seems to be asking who the hell does she think she is?

The answer is clear...your equal.

How uppity!

Thursday, April 13, 2006

A vote-based pondering...

A bitch battled a major allergy attack yesterday. My eyes were a faucet and this bitch broke the world record for sneezing. Suffice it say, my mood was sour by the time a bitch made it home.

After greeting the sorta-beagle and Sweetie the three legged chow, a bitch went through the mail. Usually, Betsey the sorta-beagle consumes our magazines when they shoot through the mail slot, so a bitch was somewhat surprised to see that the Newsweek was intact.

And then my ass flipped it over…and was confronted with Katie Couric on the cover!

Lawd have mercy!

Thanks for killing a bitch’s joy, Newsweek.

Moving forward pissed off and prepared to shred an entire issue of Newsweek out of spite…

A vote-based pondering...
New Orleans is preparing to have elections on April 22nd. With so many displaced residents scattered all over the place, many of us are concerned that the people will be denied their voice as a result. Pfirsch from Brown Sugar, LTD reminded a bitch of this issue and has posted about it here.

For information about how to vote, please check this site.

A bitch is amazed that a government that couldn’t find its ass with both hands is now holding displaced residents to a standard of organization that the same government couldn’t meet to save its life on a good day. Being displaced, having your whole world torn apart and then being denied your Constitutional right to vote…that’s a MasterCard moment if a bitch ever saw one…mmmmhmmm, priceless.

A bitch will stay on top of this as well.

The vote is vital...the blood of martyrs was shed to win it…and we must be prepared to defend it or we had best start preparing to loose it.

And a bitch has no intention of allowing that to happen.

Save the dates!

There are a lot of cool events coming up in St. Louis and a bitch recommends that you save these dates, buys some tickets...and several vodka crans...and get your socializing ass out to support them!

Venus Envy
This weekend, people!
April 14th and April 15th 7pm - Midnight
Venus Envy is an organization driven by women which positively affects everyone by empowering women through the arts.
Its fun, the mission kicks ass and everyone who is anyone will be there.
Support this shit!

A Tasteful Affair
April 30th 2pm-5pm
Worth every freaking dollar!
This event benefits Food Outreach. Food Outreach’s mission is to provide nutritional support and enhance the quality of life of men, women and chil’ren living with HIV/AIDS or cancer.
Three hours of feasting followed by feasting followed by more feasting in support of one of the most amazing organizations in St. Louis.

Cocktails for Life
Kickoff Party May 3rd
Event May 17th
Cocktails for Life is an annual fundraising event to benefit Pets Are Wonderful Support (PAWS), a program of Saint Louis Effort For AIDS. PAWS was founded in 1990 with the knowledge that the bond we have with pets is sacred, and in the case of those with HIV/AIDS, sometimes pets provide the only daily dose of love and affection they receive. PAWS provides clients who can no longer afford to keep their pets with free food, vet care, grooming, and even kenneling of pets if one must enter a hospital. Steps are also taken to place pets if a client were to pass away.

Visit the website for information about participating bars (yes, this is a drink based event) and how to get tickets to the kickoff party. A bitch will be posting more information as this event nears!

Save these dates and prepare to put on your party hats and support these local organizations making a difference in St. Louis!

Wednesday, April 12, 2006

Ice cream for breakfast...

My beloved father passed away several years ago. He died in April, so this month is rather hard for me. Memories swirl and they still cause the heart to ache even with the passage of time.

My father was one of the most influential people in my life. His humor, dedication to serving the community and love of history are part of my inheritance. A bitch nurtures those gifts daily.

A bitch believes that a person is truly blessed by the people the Devine One brings into their life. My father was my blessing and he still is.

One of my fondest memories of my father is of his ability to say crazy shit with a straight face and how he often used this skill to cut tension in my childhood.

My mother was a very paranoid woman. She feared everything and even feared fear. As a child, she used to deny any requests to participate in sleep-overs or visits because she doubted the common sense of other parents. Because of my brother’s autism and hyper-activity, having friends sleep over at my house was pretty much out of the question. So, a bitch became isolated and lost a few friends who failed to understand that my lack of socialization wasn’t bitchitude based.

Some of my fellow students teased me mercilessly about our 'crazy house', my 'crazy' brother and all manner of things related to race. The more paranoid my mother became the more she isolated us. And as we became more isolated my peers became crueler…building up a mythology about my home life that went beyond embarrassment into a sphere my ass has yet to define.

A bitch became a freak and lacked the ability to defend myself against that label on top of the multitude of negative labels already heaped on my afro-puffed head.

My father was a perceptive man and he understood that a bitch was hurt and frustrated. One Saturday a bitch had two of my only friends over for a visit. My mother and brother were out of the house and this bitch had spent hours cleaning and perfecting my home image the night before. Everything had to be perfect…the report back to my peers on Monday had to be positive, because this bitch just couldn’t take any more drama. We gathered in the kitchen after playing outside and watched my father prepare lunch.

My father, with a twinkle in his eye, turned to my friends and asked…"So, what’s it gonna be? Cake, ice cream or cake and ice cream?”

He looked serious as a motherfucker.

My friends snorted and replied…"We can’t have cake and ice cream for lunch!”

Dad looked confused. “Well, we usually have cake and ice cream for breakfast, but sometimes it’s cool to have breakfast for lunch too.”

My friends looked about ready to pass out from envy. “Wow! We didn’t know you had ice cream for breakfast! Wow! That’s too cool. No way would we ever get ice cream or cake for breakfast or lunch in our house.”

Initially, a bitch was embarrassed. My father’s brand of humor wasn’t for everyone. But, watching as he made my friends laugh and ooze pre-teen jealousy over the complete bullshit lie that we ate masses of ice cream every morning, a bitch loosened up.

We settled on sandwiches...and then ice cream with cake.

And my father was once again the hero of my universe.

Life is short and the journey is not always smooth. Jump off the train every now and then and settle down for a hot fudge sundae for breakfast, lunch or dinner.

Love you, Daddy…forever and always.

Some information...

A bitch has several readers currently serving in the United States military.

Gasp!

It’s true. Some are conservative and some are liberal...some are abroad and others are stationed here in America. Although this bitch is against the war my ass is not anti-soldier. A bitch comes from a multigenerational military family. My grandfather was a World War II vet and my father was in the Air Force. They have both passed away, but the legacy of their service, their experience as black men in service to a country that denied them civil rights despite that service and the legacy of discipline and dedication instilled in them through that service are a part of me forever.

A certain Air Force 1 sent this bitch some information about Fisher House, which is an organization that provides housing and services to military families while their family member is undergoing medical treatment. Many service men and woman return home injured and Fisher House allows their families to be near them while they are treated and recover.

A bitch is firmly against the Iraq war. Contrary to popular conservative belief, that does not mean that a bitch does not support the troops. Rather, a bitch believes that it is my duty to speak out against this war because of my support for the troops, my respect for their lives and the lives of everyone involved in this war and my personal conviction that they should not be in harms way in support of this effort.

It is that concern that had me taking a second look at Fisher House. A bitch did some research and found out that Gary Trudeau of Doonesbury fame incorporated Fisher House in his book The Long Road Home. This book explores the long struggle for recover of a wounded soldier. Trudeau is donating the proceeds to Fisher House and this bitch just wanted to bring this to your attention as a possible way to support Fisher House and the families served through this organization.

Take this information as you wish and thank you, as always, for reading!

Tuesday, April 11, 2006

A Presidential visit...


This bitch read the news that President Bush was visiting Missouri...again...with some dismay. Clearly Scooter B. is having some hard times and a bitch is beyond freaked out that Missouri may be a comfortable place for him…a fucking safe zone…fuck it, Missouri is his security blanket!

Lawd have mercy.

After some thought a bitch revised my initial freaktitude. Jefferson City is his security blanket…and we all know that Jefferson City is not representative of Missouri…right? Shit, this bitch only visits Jefferson City to yell at elected officials, protest some dumb ass short sighted theocratic shit they are trying to pull (there are too many to list, chil’ren) or fall to my knees in gratitude to the brave few rational lawmakers still trying to do the peoples bitness.

Anyhoo, Scooter B. is being accompanied on his visit by none other than Missouri Senator Jim Talent. Talent of the talent-less Talents appears more than willing to embrace Scooter B. and provide that warm special safe place that presidents in distress require.

They will be dancing to the off-key melody of the Medicare prescription drug plan band…which Missouri conservatives are so fucking proud of, because 2/3rds of Missourians who qualified for that piece of rancid shit signed up for it…and they seem to equate signing up for the right to be treated like shit with enjoying being treated like shit. Actually Missouri conservatives, Scooter B. and Senator Talent of the talent-less Talents are trying to spin it even further! Their position is that Missourians signing up for the right to be treated like shit means that being treated like shit is good for Missourians.

Amazing!

A bitch has a few questions for the happy couple.

Has the cost of drugs gone down or has the scope of coverage gone up?

And has this new drug benefit done anything to address the crisis that is Medicare, the future drama that is the Boomer retirement on the horizon and the fact that our government is paying more for meds because they willingly failed to negotiate on the cost of meds and decided to pass that shit on to the broke and exhausted underpaid and already tapped out by the cost of gas masses?

Just curious.

Oh, and touring among the faithful in Jefferson City while the masses curse your name is like touting American agricultural reform from a beach in Lisbon.

Friday, April 07, 2006

Deja vue...

A bitch has a lot of shit to say today, so this will be the first of several posts.

Jumping in with maximum bitchitude...

Deja vue...
This bitch read the news of Scooter Libby’s testimony regarding who told him to do what and when in relation to the CIA leak case with a certain lack of shock. If President Bush (Scooter B. to this bitch) hadn’t been born while Nixon was still alive, a bitch would wonder if he wasn’t the reincarnation of Millhouse.

Okay, so Scooter Libby says that Cheney told him to leak classified information to refute Ambassador Wilson’s claim that the administration was on crack regarding all things nuclear and Iraqi. Libby’s testimony goes on the state that Cheney said that Bush told him to tell Libby to go forth and spin…under the table…like a thief in the night…and off the record like a secret track on an old school funk album…which makes the current assertion that the President wasn’t technically leaking information seem like the bullshit on ice that it is.

One of my favorite possessions is the documentary series on Watergate produced by Discovery. C-Money and this bitch watch it at least once a month, because it is beneficial to remember just how corrupt and stupid the powerful can be. The documentary contains a lot of interviews with the key Watergate players including Nixon…and Nixon talking about Watergate is a clinic in bullshit, paranoia and the amazing delusional power of the human mind.

A bitch mentions this because Richard Nixon actually addresses the issue of Presidential powers in the documentary. Specifically, Nixon asserts that ‘if the President does it, then it is not a crime’. 'It' being any damned thing he wanted to do. Most people either never knew or have forgotten that the debate over presidential powers was at the heart of Watergate. Congress, the Supreme Court, the Special Prosecutor’s office and the administration went to war over the limits of presidential power and who enforces those limits.

Which brings us to the current administration…and the resurrection of this debate…and why President Bush is beginning to metamorphasize into Richard Nixon without the foreign policy chops.

The utilization of governmental tools to spy domestically is one thing…circumnavigating the legal system to spy domestically and then refusing to admit that doing so is illegal is Nixonian.

Debating critics of Presidential strategy is historically common…employing governmental power as a weapon against your critics, attacking them with lies and off the records rumor-based bullshit and attempting to destroy careers through unfounded character assassination…well, that’s Nixonian like a motherfucker.

A bitch is amazed that any journalist covering this multiplying pile of corruption would attempt to do so without framing it against the previously settled law of the Nixon investigations. The Supreme Court settled the discussion of the limits of Presidential power when it ruled that Nixon had to hand over his tapes to the Special Prosecutor in the Watergate investigation. Congress settled the issue of just how far a President could go to shore up his policy against critiques when it issued multiple counts of impeachment against Richard Nixon. And Nixon settled the issue of who was right and whether he went too far when he resigned from office, went fetal for several years and watched his cronies rack up jail time like it was going out of style.

Does Scooter Libby’s testimony specifically state that Bush told Cheney to tell Libby to leak the name of a covert CIA operative?

No.

Does this scandal reek to high heaven; does this behavior shine a harsh light on the hypocritical righteousness within the administration, should this investigation continue?

Hell yes.

One more point…a bitch has been pondering the problem of linking religion and politics. Follow me for a second on this one. See, a bitch strongly supports the separation of church and state because it protects both church and state. This relates to the current scandal based administration. Bush has wrapped himself in the cloak of Evangelical Christianity. He ran for office twice on a platform of Christ guiding his policy. Check that knee before it jerks…a bitch thought that was bullshit too. However, we are now a global community, many people are being introduced to Christianity through this overtly faith branded administration and this bitch happens to think that the current administration is giving Christianity a bad name. Which is the ever loving point behind the separation of church and state.

Link the two and you link the good, the bad and the ugly. And this bitch observes the lies, back stabbing, corruption, illegality, hypocrisy, judgment and overt Judeo Christian sin and just can’t make that shit jive with what Jesus would do.

WWJD? Because we already know what Bush did do when confronted with moral and ethical challenges. Having raised the issue of how his faith guides him… how he seeks guidance from a higher power…how he is defined by faith…isn’t it fair game to question his faith-based fitness?

Something to think about as the conservative right prepares to play the 'Faith Card' again this November…

Thursday, April 06, 2006

Tagged...

A bitch has been tagged by a certain ProfessorGQ.

Mercy.

If you were to be the opposite sex for one day, what would you do?
The same damned shit.

If you had to name the most difficult thing about being a teenager today, what would you say?
So much technology and so little advancement.

If you had to name the most embarrassing moment of your life, when was it?
Years ago and it involved a sheer flesh colored outfit, my period and the front pew of a church.

Damn, damn and damn.

If you had to name the most overrated actor in Hollywood, who would it be?
Jennifer Anniston

If you had to name the one personality trait that you have tried the hardest to change in yourself, what would you say?
Hmmm. My tendency to dismiss people for certain things without allowing them the opportunity to explain shit…but, then again, that has worked out pretty well in most cases. Usually a bitch is on the money, the individual really is an asshole and my life is better off without them in it. But not always…

If you could go back for one minute to the Garden of Eden and give Adam advice, what would you say?
My ass would be giving Eve some advice.

If you were to name the best “I told you so” you ever got to deliver, what was it?
The best one was the one a bitch decided to hold back on.

If you were Madonna, what would you do for your next publicity stunt?
If a bitch were Madonna there would be no publicity stunts.

If you could have a lifetime 50 percent discount in any single store at your local mall, which store would it be in?
A bitch can’t suffer malls…not even for a 50% discount.

If you could have one more pet, what kind would you get, and what would you name it?
Another dawg and a bitch would name her Rufus.

If you could have God perform one miracle today, what would you want it to be?
Oh my! This bitch would ask that the Devine One’s will be done in all things.

If you could spend next New Year’s Eve doing anything, what would you do, and with whom?
If you have to ask you don't know this bitch...

If you were to set your country’s immigration policy, what would it be?
Equal.

If you were given the power to settle the issue of gays in the military, what policy would you set?
A bitch isn’t big on military expansion…but my ass isn’t big on bigotry either. Ask, tell and go with Gawd…

If you could have one person you have lost touch with call you up tonight and invite you to dinner, who would you want it to be?
Cathy C. from high school.

If you could change one thing about your love life, what would it be?
More love and less drama.

If you could have prevented one book from ever having been written, which book would it be?None...what is ‘is’ and was meant to be.

If you have to name the best music album ever recorded, which would you select?
Bitches Brew by Miles Davis.

If you could have one thing made out of pure gold, what would you choose?
A shark.

If God were to whisper one thing in your ear, what would you like Him to say?
Go on with your bad self…

Wednesday, April 05, 2006

PubDef's amazing election coverage...

A bitch just has to acknowledge the fantastically thorough election coverage provided by PubDef!

That brother was posting updates with a frequency that would have had Dan Rather’s head spinning!

PubDef provided accurate information on election results faster, with more frequent updates and all night long.

Absolutely fantabulous work.

Go on with your bad self!

Ease on down, ease on down the road...

This bitch woke up to the glorious news that a certain orangish pink faux tan sporting and extremely preserved, almost to the point of mummification, Ms. Katie Couric is officially leaving the Today Show.

Suddenly, the music of The Wiz began playing in my mind!

A bitch had to sing…at 7 o'clock in the morning...for real.

'Can’t you feel a brand new day?'
'Can’t you feel a brand new day?'


A bitch fixed a celebratory breakfast of chorizo sausage and cheesy eggs accompanied by potatoes fried with onions.

Fantabulous!

Get thee gone, Couric! Get thee gone...

Tuesday, April 04, 2006

Featured in The Guardian...this bitch!

This bitch was just cruising through my site meter to see who is visiting and where the hell they came from, when a curious link appeared. It was a referral from The Guardian…and the Technology section to be specific.

Oh my!

This bitch just had to click over, because my ass being featured in association with any type of technology was a must see. As my system slowly meandered over a bitch had a sudden wave of fear.

What if they have linked to this bitch as an example of a technologically challenged blogger! Oh, the horror! What bullshit! A bitch might have to book a flight ...or dial long distance...and go tell those Guardian people to kiss my black...

Before a bitch could even start cursing The Guardian and all associated with it to the eternal fires of hell, the page loaded and relieved my fears.

This bitch is featured in an article about Feminist bloggers!

Cool.

Whew (wink).

For the record, a bitch is broke and only getting more broke. Educated? Why the hell do you think a bitch is broke?

Shit.

Anyhoo, a bitch is beyond flattered to be featured anywhere with writers like those at Salon.com’s Broadsheet, Bitch PhD, Feministing, the F-Word, Philobiblion, MindtheGapCardiff and Gendergeek.

Seriously beyond flattered.

The article, among other things, delves into the question of whether our blogs inspire activism or are simply a place to flex.

Now, this bitch knows that my ass is always talking about my volunteer work and so forth. But my ass would love to hear from y’all about what you are doing on a grassroots level specific to social change and feminism and whether blogs serve as an inspiration, informational resource or just entertainment.

Although the article is specifically about feminism…and this bitch is all anxious to hear what y’all are up to on that topic…please feel free to include comments about all manner of activism.

And to my feminist sisters featured in The Guardian article, y’all inspire the hell out of this bitch. And a bitch, in turn, seeks to inspire others on and offline. Your writings are a constant source of fuel, they get me off my ass on the days when a bitch just doesn’t feel like it and they educate me daily!

So, one woman is inspired to get active through feminist blogs…and one empowered AngryBlackBitch can get all manner of shit accomplished!

Toodles…

Pondering The Hammer...

Ah, what a beautiful spring morning in Missouri! A bitch voted early this morning and was more than a wee bit disappointed that my polling spot didn’t have stickers. What's up with that?

Jumping in without delay (a snicker followed by a snort)…

A certain Representative DeLay has announced that he will resign from The House. Oh my! The Hammer is not known to back down from a fight. Whatever could be the matter?

ABB’s Pondering of The Hammer’s Resignation
The Hammer is in the midst of some serious shit. The Master of Nastification is under indictment in Texas and a…err, Aide…umm, minion has pled guilty in the oh shit, we got caught with our hand in the cookie jar Abramoff related über-scandal. Still, a bitch didn’t expect The Hammer to bow to the heavy weight of scandal. Honestly, this bitch always thought him more Nixonian in the face of investigations and less Spiro Agnew.

Who would have thought the spawn of Satan smiling out at American in his mug shot with that fuck you grin would ever resign?

Hmmm.

A bitch has a couple of theories. Mayhap The Hammer is really caught in the mousetrap. Could it be that he wants to spend some quality time with his family…does he have a family (shudder)...prior to conviction? Could there be some sort of legal benefit in his move to establish residency outside of Texas? Or is it really true that he has to move in order to clear the way for another Republican to run in his District…and doesn’t that make him an asshole for running in the Primary in the first place?

Fuck that…shit, he’s been an asshole for years.

Or, and a bitch thinks this theory holds more water, Republicans really need DeLay’s seat and he’s mortally wounded by his own corrupt lifestyle, therefore they somehow managed to turn the hammer on The Hammer and convince him to fall on the sword. Rumor has it that this resignation may actually signal a very real concern by Republicans that they may get their asses handed to them in November.

Hmmm.

A bitch is pretty sure that 15 seats hold the sway of power in The House of Representatives and a bitch wasn’t surprised to see the morning news shows waxing on about Republican fear of a November ass whooping and so forth. What does surprise this bitch is the fact that Republicans fear an ass whipping at the hands of a rather disorganized Democratic Party.

Just imagine the minion-based panic if Democrats actually got that act together?

Mercy.

This bitch predicts that the stench of DeLay's brand of politics will still linger over the November elections like a silent stank fart lingers in a stuffy, overcrowded and overheated room. His resignation is the political equivalent of trying to spray air freshener to mask that level of stench, which only creates the nasty hybrid smell of lemony shit.

So long to you, Mr. DeLay. There’s a drug store somewhere in D.C. that’s already lamenting the decline in Just for Men sales…

Monday, April 03, 2006

A bitch is calling a church meeting...

Ahem.

As a fully ordained sistah of extreme bitchitude, this bitch is officially calling for a meeting of the United Church of Bitchitude and Latter Day Drunks!

When? Saturday April 8th around 9pm (we don’t hold to precision, but this bitch shall arrive before 9:30pm and Brother Rob had best get his pretty ass there by 10pm.)

Where? Grandma’s Politician Lounge on the Manchester Strip.

Why? Why the hell not?

Hope to see the St. Louis faithful in attendance!

Note – Feel free to gather in fellowship if you are not in St. Louis and remember our most sacred commandment…Thou Shall Not Trifle or be Trifled With.

Toodles until tomorrow…

My normal...

Daylight savings is fucked up! A bitch’s system is a mess. Oh well, my ass hopes everyone remembered to check their batteries in their smoke detectors…and reset their clocks.

Okay chil’ren…tomorrow is Election Day and this bitch urges everyone to get their vote on! A bitch has been bombarded with election based mail and e-mails. As usual, this bitch is researching the topics and candidates through multiple sources. My ass is currently perusing Pub Def (who was kind enough to publish a video voter guide), the Arch City Chronicle and the St. Louis Post Dispatch and then back reference the actual mailings, web sites and so forth.

See y’all al the polls tomorrow…

My normal…
April is Autism Awareness Month. This bitch’s older brother, Bill, is autistic, hyperactive, and aphasic . 1 in 166 chil’ren is born with autism, which is currently defined as a spectrum condition. Bill is profoundly autistic and manifests a whole lot of that spectrum on a daily basis.

Autism is a family condition. Parents, chil’ren, siblings, cousins, grandparents and so forth are impacted by the joy and concern…the frustration and the drama…the spectrum of experiences that accompanies this spectrum-based condition.

Being the youngest in my family, this bitch has always lived with autism. People often ask me if it was hard growing up with an autistic sibling and a bitch always answers that it was my normal. It took me some time to get to that point of understanding.

Someone asked several posts ago whether a bitch has faith in Gawd and the question made me think about Bill.

As a wee bitch, my ass believed that Gawd answered the prayers of good people. Be good…be perfect in the Devine One’s eyes…and your prayers would be answered. What a deal! So, a bitch prayed every single day that my brother Bill wake up normal. This was not a malicious prayer. A bitch witnessed him struggle with language, potty training, control and basically everything. My ass just wanted him to be ‘normal’. Added to Bill’s struggle was the impact his being autistic had on our family. A bitch was too young to realize that my parent’s marriage was going to shit for a whole lot of reasons…my ass was certain that it was because of autism and the strain of utilizing our family as a treatment mechanism daily.

This bitch slowly became enraged that Gawd wasn’t making Bill normal. My ass woke up on time for school, meticulously cleaned my room, ate all my vegetables, never used naughty words (wink) and literally asked for forgiveness immediately after any child-based transgression all in an effort to ensure my goodness, Gawd’s pleasure and Bill’s cure.

Yet, day after day, a bitch woke up to autistic drama. Bill sitting naked on the front lawn eating an apple and soaking up the sun and the horrified stares of our asshole neighbors…which is funny as shit now, but beyond mortifying then. Bill using his closet as a toilet, his waste as finger paint and his temper as language. Day after fucking day, month after month, prayer after prayer.

By rage built and then crested. A bitch lost it one afternoon when Bill was having a tantrum…again. My ass flew to my bedroom and began hitting my pillow and cursing Gawd. At 9 years old my ass was angry, but still infused with faith. In my mind, Gawd just needed to see that a bitch was pissed.

“Hello? This shit isn’t cool! Fair is fair and this bitch has been good as a motherfucker...so fix this shit NOW!”

Finally, my anger was spent and a bitch indulged in a crying jag. Spent and exhausted, curled up on the bed and my ass had a pre-teen meltdown. Then…and this bitch remembers it as if it were yesterday…a bitch was fine.

'Fine' washed right over me like a fucking wave…cool and calming, contentment in full glory. A prayer answered…and normal redefined.

My normal was born and a bitch has been grateful to Gawd everyday since for the gift of that.

See, Bill is perfect in Gawd’s eyes. It was a bitch who needed some work. Over the years this bitch has worked through a lot of shit regarding Bill. He is, after all, my older brother and it is my responsibility to be bitter now and then (wink).

That’s just…well, normal.

April is Autism Awareness Month.

Be aware of the redefinition of normal within the spectrum…of the generosity of the human mind…and of the thousands of families living their own normal in your community.

The Gumdrop Stage of Grief ...

So many of you have shared condolences and support after the death of my beloved brother Bill from COVID-19. I wish I could thank you indiv...