Monday, May 08, 2006

Beltway drama...

This bitch spent the weekend confused as a motherfucker about this whole CIA director resignation and then quick assed nomination shit.

My ass is still confused, but some of the facts are falling into place. And this current drama-based Beltway bullshit circle of fucktitude has become my new favorite television show.

The daytime soaps can't compete with this shit to save their ratings, chil'ren!


A certain CIA Director Porter Goss abruptly resigned Friday. It seems that he was either forced out or told his bosses to fuck off. The media then went into frenzy with reports about a massive turf war and all manner of ego-based drama going down between Director of National Intelligence John D. Negroponte and Porter Goss.

Negroponte of the Head Spy Guy in Charge Negropontes had barely finished savoring his power-based victory when word hit that his Mini-Me, Gen. Michael V. Hayden, was being upgraded to a…well, a higher minification status. General Hayden has been tapped to replace Porter Goss at the CIA!

Lawd have mercy, these people are moving fast as a motherfucker. As a matter of fact, they moved so fast that it appears they forgot to get Republicans on board the bullshit train regarding all things General Hayden related.

Anyhoo, while waiting for the news cycle to refresh itself over the weekend a bitch searched for clarification on why Porter was out.



P is for Porter.

Mercy, a bitch was having a bizarre All the President’s Men moment…and damned if that wasn’t strangely validated when a bitch read that some sort of naughty old boys club shit had gone down at the Watergate and it was connected sort of to Porter.

P is still for Porter!

Well, you’ve got to be a All the President’s Men fanatic to get it (wink).

Anyway, Porter as Director of the CIA appointed a certain Michael Kostiw as director of some sort of shit only to have that blow up when it was uncovered that Kostiw was scandaliciously kicked to the curb 20 years ago. That shit was leaked…and that leakage got some folks in trouble.


So, Kostiw was out and Kyle "Dusty" Foggo replaced him...and Foggo de Oh no is being investigated to see if he tossed some sweet assed contracts to a buddy who just happens to be connected to a certain disgraced and in jail Rep. Randy "Duke" Cunningham (R-Calif.).

One more time for shits and giggles…who the fuck is taking care of the people’s bitness while all this shit is going down?

Jesus to Gawd, is everyone a motherfucking crook?

Shit, that is almost more Nixonian than Nixon.

And the laughs keep coming as a certain Decider has slapped his cards on the table…with authority and not one ounce of common sense…in support of General Hayden to replace Porter. If the rumbles of discontent over the weekend are any indication we may be in for another Harriet Miers-esque feeding frenzy!

Lately, politics is more drama filled than daytime television. This shit is worthy of the Colbys and the Carringtons!


blue moon girl said...

You're so eloquent. Your vocabulary is vast. Such a well-educated, intelligent, classy person! In this Age of Vulgarity, you really stand out!

Anonymous said...

Well, for one thing Arlen Specter is probably having a major bitch fit right about now. He's still hella-pissed about that whole eavesdropping thing and isn't likely to go along with the guy who authorized it becoming CIA chief.

Hammer said...

ABB, I'm worried today. It seems the W administration has other plans for the CIA...first trying to blame it for 9/11, then for 'no WMDs' and now, they want to militarize the agency? (as if we didn't already have the DIA (defense intel. agency))...what's really going on here?

Why does Bush want to destroy the CIA?

I'm concerned. I used to want the CIA destroyed as well, but now, I'm just confused.


Putting a military official (granted he will have to step back into the 'civilian role'-while maintaining the mindset of a militarian) as CIA director will surely piss off the CIA employees, no?

Maybe Bush just hates all working class citizens. He is constantly declaring war on us. A white man's war too! filled with passive aggressive nonsense to widen the gap between the poor and the rich...

You know what your play husband says about that...W.P.B.S!!!

ok, I need a drink tonight! damn it!



Phoenix said...

love the Dynasty reference

Shavita said...

Good night! I leave town for one weekend (no television) and look what happens.

Homer said...

Except Laura and and Lynn and Condi probably don't regularly get in cat fights in pools and mud pits. On the other hand, there is that vice-presidential lesbian daughter Mary (a la Stephen).

Danielle said...

Where on earth do you find these pictures of the politicians? They are hilarious. If you ever catch David Letterman at night, he usually does a stunt called, "Proud moments in Presidential speeches" or soemthing like that. He'll start by showing a clip of "We have nothing to fear but fear itself", then a clip of Kennedy saying, "Ask not what your country can do for you...", and last but not least, a REALLY random clip of W saying something extremely stupid.